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Today more people are travelling than ever before. Why is this the case? What are the benefits of travelling for the traveller? v.13

Today more people are travelling than ever before. Why is this the case? What are the benefits of travelling for the traveller? v. 13
These days, undoubtedly the number of travellers has increased significantly. The main reason for this is the globalisation and this not only help an individual to expand their business, but also abolishes the cultural differences between the people of various regions. The crucial reason for the proliferated rate of travelling is the expansion of markets throughout the globe. Nowadays people travel to different places in order to promote their work or business by conducting various seminars and meetings with international clients. As a result, their business excels not only in their native region but throughout the world. To exemplify, according to the recent report by the aviation authority of India, 20% of the total daily travellers in aeroplanes are business tycoons. Therefore, travelling has become a quintessential part to run a successful business. Undeniably, travelling provides numerous benefits to travellers. The first and foremost is the promotion of their business. Through travelling, travellers can commercialise their local products and earn profits, which can also increase the number of their international clients. Secondly, when people travel to other regions, this narrow downs the cultural differences which further lead to oneness and brotherhood reducing the tensions between various countries and regions. Additionally, this also provides various opportunities for young people to work in technically advanced areas. In conclusion, despite the increased cost of travelling, people prefer to commute to other areas and nations in order to expand their business globally. The commercialisation of local products and employment opportunities are the major advantages of travelling to travellers.
These days,
undoubtedly
the number of
Possible spelling mistake found.
travellers
has increased
significantly
. The main reason for this is the
Possible spelling mistake. 'globalisation' is British English.
globalisation
and this not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
an individual to expand their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
abolishes the cultural differences between the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
various
regions.

The crucial reason for the proliferated rate of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travelling
is the expansion of markets throughout the globe. Nowadays
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
travel to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
places in order to promote their work or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
by conducting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
various
seminars and meetings with international clients.
As a result
, their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
excels not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
in their native region
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
throughout the world. To exemplify, according to the recent report by the aviation authority of India, 20% of the total daily
Possible spelling mistake found.
travellers
in
Possible spelling mistake. 'aeroplanes' is British English.
aeroplanes
are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
tycoons.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travelling
has become a quintessential part to run a successful business.

Undeniably
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travelling
provides numerous benefits to
Possible spelling mistake found.
travellers
. The
first
and foremost is the promotion of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
. Through
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travelling
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
travellers
can
Possible spelling mistake. 'commercialise' is British English.
commercialise
their local products and earn profits, which can
also
increase the number of their international clients.
Secondly
, when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
travel to other regions, this narrow downs the cultural differences which
further
lead to oneness and brotherhood reducing the tensions between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
various
countries and regions.
Additionally
, this
also
provides
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
various
opportunities for young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to work in
technically
advanced areas.

In conclusion
, despite the increased cost of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travelling
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
prefer to commute to other areas and nations in order to expand their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
globally. The
Possible spelling mistake. 'commercialisation' is British English.
commercialisation
of local products and employment opportunities are the major advantages of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travelling
to
Possible spelling mistake found.
travellers
.
14Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
26Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9Mistakes

IELTS essay Today more people are travelling than ever before. Why is this the case? What are the benefits of travelling for the traveller? v. 13

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
254 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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