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Today more and more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult, such as the Sahara desert or the Antarctica. What are the advantages and disadvantages for tourists who visit such places? v.24

Today more and more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult, such as the Sahara desert or the Antarctica. What are the advantages and disadvantages for tourists who visit such places? v. 24
In recent times, people showing interest in tourism have grown inadvertently. Nowadays, the increasing number of travellers is choosing destinations such as the Sahara desert or the Antartic where survival is always challenging. This helps in overcoming the anxiety of witnessing everything new. However, chances of people losing track of the travel and getting trapped is more in these places. Travelling has become a mode of experiencing and overcoming the tougher situations the places like the Mount Everest and the Amazon has to offer. Firstly, travellers not just witness the rare plant and the animal species, but also learn how to deal with the danger it might pose. Moreover, harsh climatic conditions would make people feel the worst possible weather conditions, which will only make them stronger as well as prepare them for even more dangerous scenarios. To illustrate, according to a report published by the Tour De World magazine, around 80 percentage who traversed to intricate tourist places were able to overcome the fear of extreme climate and wild animals. Admittedly, tourists' are gaining complicated and unique experiences by opting to visit hostile tourist spots. But on some occasions, due to lack of familiarity with the geography of the visited desert or the mountain, people have completely gone missing. Because of limitations in communication and navigation system, tourists often endure the risk of loosing track of their travel companions. Scenarios such as this could become a matter of life and death for the crew members. To exemplify, according to the Indian Tourism Authority, since 2015, more than 2000 thousand truckers have lost their lives in the Himalayan region because of deviating from the safe travel zone. In order to survive and overcome all the barriers, individuals should be in touch with the gang and stay within the boundary. Plenty of enthusiast are exploring the complicated tourist destinations in recent years. To conclude, this essay discussed that travelling to dangerous locations could help in overcoming the fear of being in unknown areas, meanwhile why there is a possibility of getting lost.
In recent times,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
showing interest in tourism have grown
inadvertently
. Nowadays, the increasing number of
Possible spelling mistake found.
travellers
is choosing destinations such as the Sahara desert or the
Possible spelling mistake found.
Antartic
where survival is always challenging. This
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
in overcoming the anxiety of witnessing everything new.
However
, chances of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
losing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
track
of the travel and getting trapped is more in these places.

Travelling has become a mode of experiencing and overcoming the tougher situations the places like the Mount Everest and the Amazon
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
offer.
Firstly
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
travellers
not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
witness the rare plant and the animal species,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
learn how to deal with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
danger
it might pose.
Moreover
, harsh climatic conditions would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
feel the worst possible weather conditions, which will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them stronger
Comparison requires "than", not 'then' nor 'as'.
as
well as prepare them for even more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
scenarios. To illustrate, according to a report published by the Tour
Possible spelling mistake found.
De
World magazine, around 80 percentage who traversed to intricate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourist
places were able to overcome the fear of extreme climate and wild animals.
Admittedly
, tourists' are gaining complicated and unique experiences by opting to visit hostile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourist
spots.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
on
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
occasions, due to lack of familiarity with the geography of the visited desert or the mountain,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have completely gone missing.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
of limitations in communication and navigation system,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
endure the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
of loosing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
track
of their travel companions. Scenarios such as this could become a matter of life and death for the crew members. To exemplify, according to the Indian Tourism Authority, since 2015, more than 2000 thousand truckers have lost their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
in the Himalayan region
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of deviating from the safe travel zone. In order to survive and overcome all the barriers, individuals should be in touch with the gang and stay within the boundary.

Possible agreement error. The noun enthusiast seems to be countable; consider using: "Plenty of enthusiasts".
Plenty of enthusiast
are exploring the complicated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourist
destinations in recent years.
To conclude
, this essay discussed that travelling to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
locations could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
in overcoming the fear of being in unknown areas, meanwhile why there is a possibility of getting lost.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Mistakes

IELTS essay Today more and more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult, such as the Sahara desert or the Antarctica. What are the advantages and disadvantages for tourists who visit such places? v. 24

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
341 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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