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Today more and more people are using mobile phones and computers. Thus, people are losing the ability to communicate face to face. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.5

Today more and more people are using mobile phones and computers. Thus, people are losing the ability to communicate face to face. v. 5
An increasing number of people are using mobile phones and computers nowadays. It is argued that this social phenomenon leads to the losing the ability to communicate directly of users. I partly agree with this idea depending on how people use these technological devices in their life. On the one hand, when people access to the internet with smart phones or computers, they lose their face-to-face communication because of some main reasons. Firstly, people tend to spend too much time playing games, watching movies, reading a bunch of articles appeared in their feeds. . . without talking with their family or friends. As a result, they rarely talk to other people and then gradually lose the ability to make a converstion directly. Secondly, the availability of new communicating technologies can also have the result of isolating people and discouraging real interaction. For example, many youngsters choose to make friends online rather than hang out with their fellows in the real world, and these virtual relationships are a poor substitute for real friendships. On the other hand, interaction by cell phones and computers through application like video chat on social networks are almost as good as face-to-face meetings now. It allows people in different countries to interact without meeting each other and helps them keep in touch wherever they are. For example, a student can now take video lessons with a teacher in a different city or country. In addition, now people can search for many interesting programs on the internet that teach them how to communicate well in real life. Therefore, people feel easily to assess a world of knowledge and experience in communication activities. In conclusion, computers and cell phones may lead to losing communication skills when they have face-to-face meetings. However, these high-tech equipments also help to improve communication skills depend on how people use it in their daily life.
An increasing number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are using mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
and computers nowadays. It
is argued
that this social phenomenon leads to the losing the ability to communicate
directly
of users. I partly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
depending on how
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
these technological devices in their life.

On the one hand, when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
access to the internet with smart
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
or computers, they lose their face-to-face
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communication
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
main reasons.
Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
tend to spend too much time playing games, watching movies, reading a bunch of articles appeared in their feeds.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
without
talking with their family or friends.
As a result
, they rarely talk to other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and then
gradually
lose the ability to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a
Possible spelling mistake found.
converstion
directly
.
Secondly
, the availability of new communicating technologies can
also
have the result of isolating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and discouraging
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
real
interaction.
For example
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
youngsters choose to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
friends online
rather
than hang out with their fellows in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
real
world, and these virtual relationships are a poor substitute for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
real
friendships.

On the other hand
, interaction by cell
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
and computers through application like video chat on social networks are almost as
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
as face-to-face meetings
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
. It
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allows
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
countries to interact without meeting each other and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
them
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
in touch wherever they are.
For example
, a student can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
take video lessons with a teacher in a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
city or country.
In addition
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can search for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
interesting programs on the internet that teach them how to communicate well in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
real
life.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
feel
easily
to assess a world of knowledge and experience in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communication
activities.

In conclusion
, computers and cell
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
may lead to losing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communication
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
when they have face-to-face meetings.
However
, these high-tech equipments
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communication
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
depend on how
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
it in their daily life.
14Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
22Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes

IELTS essay Today more and more people are using mobile phones and computers. Thus, people are losing the ability to communicate face to face. v. 5

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
312 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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