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Today it is common for many business meeting and business training to take place online. Do the advantages of this new development outweigh the disadvantages? v.1

Today it is common for many business meeting and business training to take place online. Do the advantages of this new development outweigh the disadvantages? v. 1
In this modern era, technology becomes an essential part of our life. Nowadays, majority of client meetings and sessions are taking place on the internet. Although Online meetings have some minor disadvantages like no face-to-face communication and deepens on machinery, It has many advantages such as time or cost saving and global connectivity. In my opinion, its positive impacts outweigh the negatives. To begin with, In online conversation there is no person to person talk and due to this sometime we miss real communication and get distracted from the real topic. Secondly, in virtual meetings, we need to depend a lot on technology such as high bandwidth internet connection, various software like Skype, Zoom. Most of these are not available in rural areas and due to this sometime we need to cancel or postpone the meeting. To exemplify, high bandwidth connection is very difficult to get in rural areas. On the other hand, online talk has many advantages. Firstly, it saves lots of time and money. For face to face conversation, an owner need to visit to client, which cost him time and wealth. Although, by using electronically connected meetings, a person can save both. Another essential point is, online meeting gives a method to connect globally. The tutor does not need to think much about the target audiences location, which is a drawback in physical meeting where tutor need to travel. To conclude, In my opinion, saving time and money is essential. There is no doubt that in physical online connected meetings have some small disadvantages where people distract from the real conversation and dependency on technology, but it has various advantages such as save lots of time and money and no need to worry about target audiences location. In my view, its positives outweigh the negatives.
In this modern era, technology becomes an essential part of our life. Nowadays,
It seems that an article is missing.
majority of
client
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meetings
and sessions are taking place on the internet. Although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meetings
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
minor disadvantages like no face-to-face communication and deepens on machinery, It has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
advantages such as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
or cost saving and global connectivity. In my opinion, its
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
impacts outweigh the negatives.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
conversation there is no person to person talk and due to this sometime we miss real communication and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
distracted from the real topic.
Secondly
, in virtual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meetings
, we
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to depend a lot on technology such as high bandwidth internet connection, various software like Skype, Zoom. Most of these are not available in rural areas and due to this sometime we
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to cancel or postpone the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meeting
. To exemplify, high bandwidth connection is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
difficult to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
in rural areas.

On the other hand
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
talk has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
advantages.
Firstly
, it saves lots of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
and money. For face to face conversation, an owner
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to visit to client, which cost him
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
and wealth. Although, by using
electronically
connected
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meetings
, a person can save both. Another essential point is,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meeting
gives a method to connect globally. The tutor does not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
much about the target audiences location, which is a drawback in physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meeting
where tutor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to travel.

To conclude
, In my opinion, saving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
and money is essential. There is no doubt that in physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
connected
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meetings
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
disadvantages where
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
distract from the real conversation and dependency on technology,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it has various advantages such as save lots of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
and money and no
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to worry about target audiences location. In my view, its positives outweigh the negatives.
6Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
24Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay Today it is common for many business meeting and business training to take place online. Do the advantages of this new development outweigh the disadvantages? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
298 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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