Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

This table shows how many people in millions used different form public transport in Milan between 2010 and 2014 v.1

This table shows how many people in millions used different form public transport in Milan between 2010 and 2014 v. 1
People have different views about whether children should grow up in the city or in the countryside. While the countryside provides a healthy and secure environment for children to live in, there is a lack of educational opportunities. On the other hand, metropolitan areas offer a various and better educational environment for children. Therefore, I believe that life in the city is more suitable for children to grow up. There is little doubt that the countryside has no polluted air, which was caused by industrial factories or the significant amount of cars, and it enables children to spend time exercising and walking with friends. With these reasons, children would have an enjoyable childhood rather than playing computer games or staying at home alone. However, there are disadvantages for children living in rural areas, such as limited educational opportunity and only has a small quantity of educational institution. Hence, children cannot have as many academic achievements compared with children who live in a well-developed city. On the other hand, cities provide a various amount of educational options for children to choose from. For example, children can discover a wide range of hobbies and interest, such as sports, music, and art through different types of institution. Additionally, cities also have a considerable amount of tertiary academic institutions for children, and this could result in children to achieve a higher quality for future careers. Although metropolitan areas cannot provide a healthy environment for children comparing with rural areas; with the advantages of educations, this concern is minor. In conclusion, the countryside is an excellent environment for children’s health, but it does not provide an excellent opportunity for children to study. In contrary, cities offer considerable opportunities and various amounts of educational options for children. Therefore, it is better for children to grow up in the urban area.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
views about whether
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
should grow up in the city or in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countryside
. While the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countryside
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
provides
a healthy and secure
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in, there is a lack of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
educational
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
opportunities
.
On the other hand
, metropolitan
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
offer a various and better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
educational
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
.
Therefore
, I believe that life in the city is more suitable for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to grow up.

There is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
doubt that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countryside
has no polluted air, which
was caused
by industrial factories or the significant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
of cars, and it enables
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to spend time exercising and walking with friends. With these reasons,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
would have an enjoyable childhood
rather
than playing computer games or staying at home alone.
However
, there are disadvantages for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
living in rural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
, such as limited
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
educational
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
opportunity
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
has a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
quantity of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
educational
institution.
Hence
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
cannot have as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
academic achievements compared with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in a well-developed city.

On the other hand
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
provide
a various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
educational
options for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to choose from.
For example
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
can discover a wide range of hobbies and interest, such as sports, music, and art through
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
types of institution.
Additionally
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
also
have a considerable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
of tertiary academic institutions for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
, and this could result in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to achieve a higher quality for future careers. Although metropolitan
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
cannot
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
provide
a healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
comparing with rural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
; with the advantages of educations, this concern is minor.

In conclusion
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countryside
is an excellent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children’s
health,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it does not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
provide
an excellent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
opportunity
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to study. In contrary,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
offer considerable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
opportunities
and various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amounts
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
educational
options for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
.
Therefore
, it is better for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to grow up in the urban
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
area
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay This table shows how many people in millions used different form public transport in Milan between 2010 and 2014 v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
304 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts