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The table below shows the estimated oil capacity of six countries, in millions of barrels per day, from 1990 to 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. You should spend about 20 minu v.1

The table below shows the estimated oil capacity of six countries, in millions of barrels per day, from 1990 to 2010.
Recently, it has been observed that in various parts of the world, parents and teachers physically punish children in order to discipline them. These people believe that there is no alternative way of correcting them other than beating them, which in my opinion is not a right way to do. I strongly believe, communicating and politely explaining children is a better way of rectifying their mistakes. There are a number of people who considers and adopt this method to instill discipline. One of the reasons I can think of, why parents punish children physically might be because they want to develop fear in their minds and want to keep them in control. So they believe, assuming the consequences of their actions, the children will never repeat the wrong behaviour. However, there are many parents and individuals, including me, who believe that instead of Smacking or physically torturing them, we can politely explain them and deal them with patience. Beating children often traumatize them and make them rebellious going forward. As a result, they get out of control even more. I’ll give you an example of my younger cousin, who constantly used to be punished at school and at home as well. Instead of learning from his mistakes and behaving well he is now even more disobedient. I believe, the reason he is ill-mannered now even more is because he was always punished and never received the right polite treatment which he needed in his early age. To conclude, parenthood isn’t easy, but they are the role model for their children and they should raise them with tolerance, patience and love. In my opinion, physical punishment is unacceptable, so therefore, parents should resist and schools where teachers continue to beat children should be regulated and governed by the concerned authorities to prevent it.
Recently, it has
been observed
that in various parts of the world,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
and teachers
physically
punish
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
in order to discipline them. These
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that there is no alternative way of correcting them other than beating them, which in my opinion is not a right way to do. I
strongly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
, communicating and
politely
explaining
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
is a better way of rectifying their mistakes.

There are a number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who considers and adopt this method to instill discipline. One of the reasons I can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
of, why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
punish
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
physically
might be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they want to develop fear in their minds and want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
them in control.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
, assuming the consequences of their actions, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
will never repeat the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
.

However
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
and individuals, including me, who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that
instead
of Smacking or
physically
torturing them, we can
politely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
them and deal them with patience. Beating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
traumatize them and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them rebellious going forward.
As a result
, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
out of control even more. I’ll give you an example of my younger cousin, who
constantly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to
be punished
at school and at home
as well
.
Instead
of learning from his mistakes and behaving well he is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
even more disobedient. I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
, the reason he is ill-mannered
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
even more is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
he was always punished and never received the right polite treatment which he needed in his early age.

To conclude
, parenthood isn’t easy,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they are the role model for their
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
children and
they should raise them with tolerance, patience and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
. In my opinion, physical punishment is unacceptable,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
should resist and schools where teachers continue to beat
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
should
be regulated
and governed by the concerned authorities to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
it.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay The table below shows the estimated oil capacity of six countries, in millions of barrels per day, from 1990 to 2010.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
302 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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