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There should be laws to control the amount and type of violence shown on television programs. To what extent do u agree/ disagree with this statement. v.2

There should be laws to control the amount and type of violence shown on television programs. v. 2
The telecast of violence shows has been increased in recent time. Some people believe that there should be restrictions to deal with the quantity and type of aggression producing programs on television. I personally totally agree with the statement, as it would be beneficial for our society. There are only a few advantages of violent programs which are mostly for particular persons. For example, it attracts the audience, so more and more people watch it. As a result, the earning of T. V channels increase dramatically. Beside this, viewers also enjoy it and forget their problems for a brief moment. However, its negative effects on our society overweight the benefits. Firstly, these types of programs make our society more prone to crimes. For instance, in 1980s when a serial killer was arrested in London, he confessed that he got his ideas from a T. V season. Similarly, many criminals have learned to escape from police from movies. In addition, it represents a negative image of our society so have a bad impact on grooming of our children. Furthermore, sometimes these shows disrupt the internal peace of many individuals causing them to be restless for a period of time. Such as, after watching a movie of a cruel king and his injustice with the general public will compel us to think about it for many days. In conclusion, as negative effects of violence T. V shows outweigh the advantages. Therefore to save our environment from these drawbacks, there must be some type of laws to monitor the amount and variety of these programs.
The telecast of violence
shows
has
been increased
in recent time.
Some
people
believe that there should be restrictions to deal with the quantity and type of aggression producing
programs
on television. I
personally
totally
agree
with the statement, as it would be beneficial for our society.

There are
only
a few advantages of violent
programs
which are
mostly
for particular persons.
For example
, it attracts the audience,
so
more and more
people
watch
it.
As a result
, the earning of T. V channels increase
dramatically
. Beside this, viewers
also
enjoy it and forget their problems for a brief moment.
However
, its
negative
effects on our society overweight the benefits.

Firstly
, these types of
programs
make
our society more prone to crimes.
For instance
,
in 1980s
when a serial killer
was arrested
in London, he confessed that he
got
his
ideas
from a T. V season.
Similarly
,
many
criminals have learned to escape from police from movies.
In addition
, it represents a
negative
image of our society
so
have a
bad
impact on grooming of our children.
Furthermore
,
sometimes
these
shows
disrupt the internal peace of
many
individuals causing them to be restless for a period of time. Such as, after watching a movie of a cruel king and his injustice with the
general public
will compel us to
think
about it for
many
days.

In conclusion
, as
negative
effects of violence T. V
shows
outweigh the advantages.
Therefore
to save our environment from these drawbacks, there
must
be
some
type of laws to monitor the amount and variety of these
programs
.
12Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes
Language is to the mind more than light is to the eye.
William Gibson

IELTS essay There should be laws to control the amount and type of violence shown on television programs. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
262 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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