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There is no need to go out to see live performance concert because it is better to see them on the TV or Computer screen Do you agree or disagree v.1

There is no need to go out to see live performance concert because it is better to see them on the TV or Computer screen v. 1
Education acts as a stepping stone, for all individuals, towards a bright future. Many even consider it essential for job readiness. In spite of it being so important, selecting an educational course has also become controversial as few believe that the selection should be done on the basis of job they want to perform rather than one's own interests. In my opinion, selecting course for higher studies is not that straight forward. Securing a job is one of the important milestones in anyone's life and many of us decide what we want to be during our childhood. Considering my own example, I had already decided to be a civil engineer when I was 14 years old and hence I pursued my engineering studies after my secondary education. Certain profiles like engineers, doctors, lawyers etc. Demand a minimum year, of course work, related to that profession, as their job requirements. As a result, aspirants wanting to take up a career in such profession need to sign up for education programs based on their job. Nevertheless, many other work profiles do not require any specify degree or diploma. One of the factors which makes us human is the ability to make free choices. Every person is unique and the skills differ from one person to another; it is not necessary that all individuals would have the same taste. Hence it is worthless for a student to take up graduation studies for which they lack the aptitude which ultimately results in frustration and drop outs. For example, the famous musician Charles Jones dropped out of business school before pursuing his interest and enrolling himself in a music school. Therefore, students should opt for studies relevant to their interest as it would help enhance their skills much better. In conclusion, although certain jobs require specified type of certification before accepting it as a profession, there are many alternate work profiles which do not demand such degrees or diplomas. As a result, the selection equally depends on both the personal choice and whether the particular course work is mandatory for the job.
Education acts as a stepping stone, for all individuals, towards a bright future.
Many
even consider it essential for
job
readiness.
In spite of
it being
so
important
, selecting an educational
course
has
also
become controversial as few believe that the selection should
be done
on the basis of
job
they want to perform
rather
than one's
own
interests. In my opinion, selecting
course
for higher
studies
is not that straight forward.

Securing a
job
is one of the
important
milestones in anyone's life and
many
of us decide what we want to be during our childhood. Considering my
own
example, I had already decided to be a civil engineer when I was 14 years
old
and
hence
I pursued my engineering
studies
after my secondary education. Certain profiles like engineers, doctors, lawyers etc. Demand a minimum year, of
course
work
, related to that profession, as their
job
requirements.
As a result
, aspirants wanting to take up a career in such profession need to
sign
up for education programs based on their
job
.
Nevertheless
,
many
other
work
profiles do not require any specify degree or diploma.

One of the factors which
makes
us human is the ability to
make
free choices. Every person is unique and the
skills
differ from one person to another; it is not necessary that all individuals would have the same taste.
Hence
it is worthless for a student to take up graduation
studies
for which they lack the aptitude which
ultimately
results in frustration and
drop outs
.
For example
, the
famous
musician Charles Jones dropped out of business school
before
pursuing his interest and enrolling himself in a music school.
Therefore
, students should opt for
studies
relevant to their interest as it would
help
enhance their
skills
much better.

In conclusion
, although certain
jobs
require specified type of certification
before
accepting it as a profession, there are
many
alternate
work
profiles which do not demand such degrees or diplomas.
As a result
, the selection
equally
depends on both the personal choice and whether the particular
course
work
is mandatory for the
job
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay There is no need to go out to see live performance concert because it is better to see them on the TV or Computer screen v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
347 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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