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There is an increasing trend around the world to have a small family rather than a large family. What are some of the advantages and disadvantages of having a small family rather than a large family? v.18

There is an increasing trend around the world to have a small family rather than a large family. What are some of the advantages and disadvantages of having a small family rather than a large family? v. 18
Family is one of the most important aspect in one lives besides jobs and education. In recent years, smaller family has become more popular compared to a huge family. This essay will discuss the benefits and drawbacks of having a small family rather than a large family. Small families tend to be increasingly popular as they are advantageous to parents and children. Firstly, the smaller the family, the lesser the cost of education for parents to pay. Cost of education has increased significantly in this years, besides, parents also need to send their child for tuition and learning new languages etc. Furthermore the smaller family will produce less conflict among siblings. A larger family with big amount of members will have much more complications, children will often argue for food and even for toys. Despite the benefits, there are also some drawbacks from having a small family in a house. The main issue is that the children without sibling or with less siblings usually feel bored. This is because supporting from family members is important in the psychological development of child's health hence without support from siblings will affect this part of development of them. In addition, children will be easily spoilt by parents if they get too much attention from their parents. For example, parents tend to give more love to their love ones when they have less children and this will cause negative impacts to their child. This essay discussed both the advantages and the disadvantages of having a small family. In short, despite the drawbacks, the benefits of having a small family should not be overlooked.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Family
is one of the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
Please check whether a plural form of 'aspect' should be used.
aspect
in one
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
besides
jobs and education. In recent years, smaller
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
has become more popular compared to a huge
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
. This essay will discuss the benefits and drawbacks of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
rather
than a large family.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
tend to be
increasingly
popular as they are advantageous to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
.
Firstly
, the smaller the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
, the lesser the cost of education for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
to pay. Cost of education has increased
significantly
in
It seems that a possessive apostrophe is missing.
this years
,
besides
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
also
need to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
their child for tuition and learning new languages etc.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Furthermore
the smaller
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
will produce less conflict among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
siblings
. A larger
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
amount of members will have much more complications,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
will
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
argue for food and even for toys.

Despite the benefits, there are
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
drawbacks from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
in a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
. The main issue is that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
without
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sibling
or with
Did you mean "fewer"? The noun siblings is countable.
less
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
siblings
usually
feel bored. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
supporting from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
members is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
in the psychological development of child's health
hence
without support from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
siblings
will affect this part of development of them.
In addition
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
will be
easily
Possible spelling mistake. 'spoilt' is British English.
spoilt
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
if they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
too much attention from their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
.
For example
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
tend to give more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
to their
Did you mean "loved ones"?
love ones
when they have
Did you mean "fewer"? The noun children is countable.
less
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
and this will cause
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impacts to their child.

This essay discussed both the advantages and the disadvantages of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
. In short, despite the drawbacks, the benefits of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
should not
be overlooked
.
12Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
35Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
Language is the blood of the soul into which thoughts run and out of which they grow.
Oliver Wendell Holmes

IELTS essay There is an increasing trend around the world to have a small family rather than a large family. What are some of the advantages and disadvantages of having a small family rather than a large family? v. 18

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
269 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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