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There are social, medical and technical problems associated with the use of mobile phones. What forms do they take? Do you agree that the problems outweigh the benefits of mobile phones? v.4

There are social, medical and technical problems associated with the use of mobile phones. What forms do they take? Do you agree that the problems outweigh the benefits of mobile phones? v. 4
New development in the field of technology has changed human life drastically and mobile phone is such an example. People often argue about various problems such as social, health and technical due to use of cell phone. However, I oppose this view and believe that there are plenty of benefits of using mobile phones. This essay will look both sides of the arguments and show how the benefits outweigh the problems associated with mobiles. To begin with, There are few disadvantages associated with mobile phones. Extra use of mobile phone can affect the eyes, which can cause some medical problems to the user. Also, People who always busy using mobile phone at home not able to give proper time to the family as well and as a result somehow, they disconnected with family. On the flip side, There are numerous advantages associated with wireless technology. Firstly, cell phones allows us to connect with family members. Mobiles reduced the distance between the peoples drastically. We can talk to our relatives whenever we want and hear their voice and also can see them through video calls. Secondly, mobile helps us to connect with friends through social media. We can make friends globally through social media such as Facebook, Instagram and many more. Thirdly, Mobile phones benefits students in their homework. They can get help with their homework within seconds also mobile keep them up to date with current affairs and inventions. To conclude, I believe, there are plenty of advantages of having mobile phone such as connected with friends and family and helps students in their homework as compare to the problems connected with it.
New development in the field of technology has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
human life
drastically
and mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
is such an example.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
argue about various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
such as social, health and technical due to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of cell
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
.
However
, I oppose this view and believe that there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plenty
of benefits of using mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
. This essay will look both sides of the arguments and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
how the benefits outweigh the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
associated with mobiles.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, There are few disadvantages associated with mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
. Extra
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
can affect the eyes, which can cause
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
medical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
to the user.
Also
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
who always busy using mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
at home not able to give proper time to the family
as well
and
as a result
somehow, they disconnected with family.

On the flip side, There are numerous advantages associated with wireless technology.
Firstly
, cell
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allows
us to connect with family members. Mobiles
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
the distance between the peoples
drastically
. We can talk to our relatives whenever we want and hear their voice and
also
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
them through video calls.
Secondly
, mobile
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
us to connect with friends through social media. We can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
friends globally through social media such as Facebook, Instagram and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
more.
Thirdly
, Mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
benefits students in their homework. They can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
with their homework within seconds
also
mobile
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
them up to date with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
affairs and inventions.

To conclude
, I believe, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plenty
of advantages of having mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
such as connected with friends and family and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
students in their homework as compare to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
connected with it.
12Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
13Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes

IELTS essay There are social, medical and technical problems associated with the use of mobile phones. What forms do they take? Do you agree that the problems outweigh the benefits of mobile phones? v. 4

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
273 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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