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The young people in the workforce are changing their jobs or careers every few years. What do you think are the reasons? Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages? v.2

The young people in the workforce are changing their jobs or careers every few years. What do you think are the reasons? Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages? v. 2
Nowadays, employees have a tendency to switch professions in a yearly basis and many believe that this has a beneficial impact on their income and the company. In this essay, I will describe several reasons of this alternation and explain why this has more merits than demerits. Firstly, they are changing for a better opportunity and salary. Youngsters in the modern and developed society are highly competitive, they are trained to become qualified and competent workers. However, newly graduated students are inexperienced and will not be capable of competing against former employees. Subsequently, they have to endure a low payment for the first few years. After a required amount of time, they will discover chances and a position that matches their effort. A recent survey announced that 81% of young individuals decided to switch to a different job or career because they feel they are underappreciated in the former profession. Secondly, these young workers wanted fresh experience and fields. In a psychological perspective, most enjoyed alternation more than stability. As a result, people easily get tired of performing the same activity and wanted to be exposed to a different career. In regards to the advantages, this action enhances their ability, therefore, affecting society development. People who are imprisoned in the same position cannot liberate and execute new ideas. For instance, a researcher working in a former, repetitive protocol will find it harder to develop solutions and findings. Moreover, the alternation of professional fields encourages workers to find their aptitude and the position that they can truly excel. This helps the society to eliminate incompetent employees and acquire passionate, sufficient workers for the field. In conclusion, regarding the two factors that influence young workers’ decision, it is more advantageous to change professions in a certain amount of time.
Nowadays, employees have a tendency to switch professions in a yearly basis and
many
believe that this has a beneficial impact on their income and the
company
. In this essay, I will
describe
several reasons of this alternation and
explain
why this has more merits than demerits.

Firstly
, they are changing for a better opportunity and salary. Youngsters in the modern and developed society are
highly
competitive, they
are trained
to become qualified and competent
workers
.
However
,
newly
graduated students
are inexperienced
and will not be capable of competing against former employees.
Subsequently
, they
have to
endure a low payment for the
first
few years. After a required amount of time, they will discover chances and a position that matches their effort. A recent survey announced that 81% of young individuals decided to switch to a
different
job or career
because
they feel they
are underappreciated
in the former profession.

Secondly
, these young
workers
wanted fresh experience and fields.
In a psychological perspective
, most enjoyed alternation more than stability.
As a result
,
people
easily
get
tired of performing the same activity and wanted to
be exposed
to a
different
career.

In regards to
the advantages, this action enhances their ability,
therefore
, affecting society development.
People
who
are imprisoned
in the same position cannot liberate and execute new
ideas
.
For instance
, a researcher working in a former, repetitive protocol will find it harder to develop solutions and findings.
Moreover
, the alternation of professional fields encourages
workers
to find their aptitude and the position that they can
truly
excel. This
helps
the society to eliminate incompetent employees and acquire passionate, sufficient
workers
for the field.

In conclusion
, regarding the two factors that influence young
workers’
decision, it is more advantageous to
change
professions in a certain amount of time.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay The young people in the workforce are changing their jobs or careers every few years. What do you think are the reasons? Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages? v. 2

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
297 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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