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The young people in the workforce are changing their jobs or careers every few years. What do you think are the reasons? Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages? v.1

The young people in the workforce are changing their jobs or careers every few years. What do you think are the reasons? Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages? v. 1
Although such topics, in all likelihood, never will yield a consensual agreement, a constructive dialogue on the statement, regions have a role in the creation of every successful person, can lead to thought-provoking discussions. My view is that irrespective of the numerous arguments that exist on either side, persons are shaped by the regions they have lived. In this essay, I shall explain it by analysing both sides of the statement. There are several reasons in favour of my stance. To commence with, economical situation of that region affect the aspirations of the people. It is important to note that when the economy of an area is not in a good shape to offer higher education, the people tends to take risks. For example, a person from a poor economy may choose foreign countries for his higher education. Therefore, the aforementioned discussion shows that regions with poor economy make the people more successful. Another pivotal aspect of the argument is that the political situation of every region affects the people's life in that area. Because of the critical background of a region, people strive to get proper benefits and eventually they will succeed. Here is a hypothetical example. People from countries that have strict rules and regulations are prone to take risks. This proves that political situations in a region plays a role in shaping personalities. To sum up, this essay discussed how economics and political situation of a region plays pivotal role in crafting a successful person. The equally potential evidence to support the arguments I have provided, underlines my opinion.
Although such topics, in all likelihood,
never will yield
a consensual agreement, a constructive dialogue on the statement,
regions
have a role in the creation of every successful
person
, can lead to
thought
-provoking discussions. My view is that irrespective of the numerous arguments that exist on either side,
persons
are shaped
by the
regions
they have
lived
. In this essay, I shall
explain
it by
analysing
both sides of the statement.

There are several reasons in
favour
of my stance. To commence with,
economical
situation
of that
region
affect the aspirations of the
people
. It is
important
to note that when the economy of an area is not in a
good
shape to offer higher education, the
people
tends
to take
risks
.
For example
, a
person
from a poor economy may choose foreign countries for his higher education.
Therefore
, the aforementioned discussion
shows
that
regions
with poor economy
make
the
people
more successful.

Another pivotal aspect of the argument is that the political
situation
of every
region
affects the
people
's life in that area.
Because
of the critical background of a
region
,
people
strive to
get
proper benefits and
eventually
they will succeed. Here is a hypothetical example.
People
from countries that have strict
rules
and regulations are prone to take
risks
. This proves that political
situations
in a
region
plays a role in shaping personalities.

To sum up, this essay discussed how economics and political
situation
of a
region
plays pivotal role in crafting a successful
person
. The
equally
potential evidence to support the arguments I have provided, underlines my opinion.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay The young people in the workforce are changing their jobs or careers every few years. What do you think are the reasons? Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
262 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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