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The world of work is rapidly changing and employees cannot depend on having the same work or the same work conditions for life. Discuss the possible causes of these changes and suggest ways to prepare people for work in the future. v.6

The world of work is rapidly changing and employees cannot depend on having the same work or the same work conditions for life. Discuss the possible causes of these changes and suggest ways to prepare people for work in the future. v. 6
As the world of work evolves, people recognize the impossibility to do the same job until retirement. This problem happens due to numerous reasons and there are some solutions to address this issue. First of all, this change arises because of the tedious working environments in humans’ demands. According to Maslow's scale, one of the factors mentioned, philosophy, states that some individuals want to experience new challenges and tasks that stretch them to demonstrate their skills, which cannot be provided if they work for a company too long or have a routine job. Hence, feeling bored and considering changing to another place or another job to seek for something new is inevitable. Moreover, being unfairly assessed is also another factor. Take income as an example, in some workplaces, the diligent employees cannot receive the pay that they deserve for what they have contributed to the organization, whereas the passive ones can get promotions just because they are on good terms with the boss. This will lead to conflicts between colleagues and make the working environment more complicated. Therefore, some people quit their current job and find a better place for them to develop their career. However, there are some various steps that can be taken to lessen the problem. First, managers should have a clear understanding of their workforce. They not only figure out what their staff needs, but also assist them to get through any difficulties. For example, allocating different tasks to each person in order for them to gain expertise and get involved in a variety of projects so that they will not do the same job every day. If they find the work challenging, managers can instruct them dedicatedly to finish properly. As a result, this action will make employees feel more refreshed and believe that their company is nurturing them, which can lengthen their stays. Besides, the remuneration policy should be equal and straightforward. Some corporations have monthly performance appraisals that can give feedback to staff members and help them overcome their shortcomings as well as praising the industrious one. Thus, workers are provided with additional insurances or rewarded with bonuses and perks for reaching objectives. Finally, associations should care about the incentives, which are effective to motivate people. For instance, organizing some trips with team-building programs to not only connect everyone, but also let them know more about their co-workers, or setting up a year-end party to celebrate and present awards for outstanding performances. In conclusion, getting through this problem means that the company is able to grow better.
As the world of work evolves,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
recognize the impossibility to do the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
until retirement. This problem happens due to numerous reasons and there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
solutions to address this issue.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
arises
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the tedious working environments in humans’ demands. According to Maslow's scale, one of the factors mentioned, philosophy, states that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
individuals want to experience new challenges and tasks that stretch them to demonstrate their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
, which cannot
be provided
if they work for a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
too long or have a routine
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
.
Hence
, feeling bored and considering changing to another place or another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
to seek for something new is inevitable.
Moreover
, being
unfairly
assessed is
also
another factor. Take income as an example, in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
workplaces, the diligent employees cannot receive the pay that they deserve for what they have contributed to the organization, whereas the passive ones can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
promotions
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they are on
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
terms with the boss. This will lead to conflicts between colleagues and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the working environment more complicated.
Therefore
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
quit their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
and find a better place for them to develop their career.

However
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
various steps that can
be taken
to lessen the problem.
First
, managers should have a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
understanding of their workforce. They not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
figure out what their staff needs,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
assist them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
through any difficulties.
For example
, allocating
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
tasks to each person in order for them to gain expertise and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
involved in a variety of projects
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that they will not do the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
every day. If they find the work challenging, managers can instruct them
Possible spelling mistake found.
dedicatedly
to finish
properly
.
As a result
, this action will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
employees feel more refreshed and believe that their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
is nurturing them, which can lengthen their stays.
Besides
, the remuneration policy should be equal and straightforward.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
corporations have monthly performance appraisals that can give feedback to staff members and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them overcome their shortcomings
as well
as praising the industrious one.
Thus
, workers
are provided
with additional insurances or rewarded with bonuses and perks for reaching objectives.
Finally
, associations should care about the incentives, which are effective to motivate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.
For instance
, organizing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
trips with team-building programs to not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
connect everyone,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
them know more about their co-workers, or setting up a year-
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
party to celebrate and present awards for outstanding performances.

In conclusion
, getting through this problem means that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
is able to grow better.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay The world of work is rapidly changing and employees cannot depend on having the same work or the same work conditions for life. Discuss the possible causes of these changes and suggest ways to prepare people for work in the future. v. 6

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
424 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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