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The world natural resources are consumed at an ever-increased rate. What are the dangers of this situation? What should we do? v.2

The world natural resources are consumed at an ever-increased rate. What are the dangers of this situation? What should we do? v. 2
It is true that the world is experiencing the problem of the overconsumption of natural resources. This has resulted in serious consequences which should be addressed urgently. This unsustainable growth in the exploitation of natural resources has already had some damaging impacts, both on the environment and on communities. In environmental terms, contamination of land, air and water has reached alarming levels owing to dependence on fossil fuels to meet growing energy demands. For instance, coal is the main source of energy in China and Australia. The burning of coal and oil result in air pollution and global warming, through the release of greenhouse gases. In social terms, forest destruction results in a shortage of timber and commercial over-fishing devastates fish stocks. These environmental problems then impact on local communities and fishing villages like Napflio in Greece, for example, threatening jobs and traditional ways of life. It is evident, therefore, that some immediate measures should be taken by governments to tackle such problems. Firstly, citizens must be encouraged to use renewable energy sources. In particular, governments need to increase investment in alternative sources including solar power and wind power to make them viable for public use in years to come. Secondly, governments should impose and enforce laws to protect and conserve natural resources. In this way, sustainable levels of the use of natural resources can be determined and those who exceed these limits or break these rules can be severely punished. Traditional fishing communities will be safeguarded and the timber industry can be controlled, so that there will always be a supply of wood for building houses in the future. In conclusion, the overconsumption of natural resources worldwide is already having major impacts and immediate measures are called for in order to mitigate the consequences.
It is true that the world is experiencing the problem of the overconsumption of
natural
resources. This has resulted in serious consequences which should
be addressed
urgently
.

This unsustainable growth in the exploitation of
natural
resources has already had
some
damaging impacts, both on the environment and on communities. In environmental terms, contamination of land, air and water has reached alarming levels owing to dependence on fossil fuels to
meet
growing energy demands.
For instance
, coal is the main source of energy in China and Australia. The burning of coal and oil result in air pollution and global warming, through the release of greenhouse gases. In social terms, forest destruction results in a shortage of timber and commercial over-fishing devastates fish stocks. These environmental problems then impact on local communities and fishing villages like
Napflio
in Greece,
for example
, threatening jobs and traditional ways of life.

It is evident,
therefore
, that
some
immediate measures should
be taken
by
governments
to tackle such problems.
Firstly
, citizens
must
be encouraged
to
use
renewable energy sources.
In particular
,
governments
need to increase investment in alternative sources including solar power and wind power to
make
them viable for public
use
in years to
come
.
Secondly
,
governments
should impose and enforce laws to protect and conserve
natural
resources. In this way, sustainable levels of the
use
of
natural
resources can
be determined
and those who exceed these limits or break these
rules
can be
severely
punished. Traditional fishing communities will
be safeguarded
and the timber industry can
be controlled
,
so
that there will always be a supply of wood for building
houses
in the future.

In conclusion
, the overconsumption of
natural
resources worldwide is already having major impacts and immediate measures
are called
for in order to mitigate the consequences.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
To have another language is to possess a second soul.
Charlemagne

IELTS essay The world natural resources are consumed at an ever-increased rate. What are the dangers of this situation? What should we do? v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
295 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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