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The woman disagrees with the student's proposal for the coffeehouse. Explain the proposal and the reasons she gives for disagreeing with it. v.1

The woman disagrees with the student's proposal for the coffeehouse. Explain the proposal and the reasons she gives for disagreeing with it. v. 1
A number of posh street stores have vanished in the last decade. The primary reason of this phenomenon is the advent of e-commerce websites, I believe and it is a positive development because people would spend their vital time and energy on productive things. There are numerous websites which are using an online platform to sell products electronically. In my point of view, online product selling websites provide heaps of choice to the customers where they can buy the product of their choice without going to the showrooms. For example, a recent article published in the The Economic Times revealed that 66% customers prefer to buy things online because of the convenience and user friendly options. This is a positive development because the time which customers used to spend in travelling to go to the stores, could utilize that precious time on activities which are more imperative. For instance, for the last 5 years I am using online websites for my different requirements i. e. The mantra for my clothing stuff and Big Basket for my home grocery requirements because I do not want to waste my time and I usually dedicate that time and energy for my IELTS exam preparation. To conclude, most of the stores are no more seen in the high class areas for the past some years. The foremost reason of this situation is the launch of user-friendly e-commerce websites which is convenient to use in my opinion. Moreover, it is a positive development because the time and energy would be saved and could be used into more useful tasks.
A number of posh street stores have vanished in the last decade. The primary reason of this phenomenon is the advent of e-commerce websites, I believe and it is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
development
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
would spend their vital
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
and energy on productive things.

There are numerous websites which are using an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
platform to sell products
electronically
. In my point of view,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
product selling websites provide heaps of choice to the customers where they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
the product of their choice without going to the showrooms.
For example
, a recent article published in
Maybe you need to remove one determiner so that only "the" or "The" is left.
the The
Economic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Times
revealed that 66% customers prefer to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
things
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the convenience and
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
user friendly
options.

This is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
development
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
which customers
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to spend in travelling to go to the stores, could utilize that precious
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
on activities which are more imperative.
For instance
, for the last 5 years I am using
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
websites for my
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
requirements
There should be no space here: "i.e.".
i. e.
The mantra for my clothing stuff and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Big
Basket for my home grocery requirements
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
I do not want to waste my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
and I
usually
dedicate that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
and energy for my IELTS exam preparation.

To conclude
, most of the stores are no more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
in the high
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
areas for the past
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
years. The foremost reason of this situation is the launch of user-friendly e-commerce websites which is convenient to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
in my opinion.
Moreover
, it is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
development
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
and energy would
be saved
and could be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
into more useful tasks.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay The woman disagrees with the student's proposal for the coffeehouse. Explain the proposal and the reasons she gives for disagreeing with it. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
264 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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