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The use of social media is replacing face-to-face interaction among many people in society. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages? v.5

The use of social media is replacing face-to-face interaction among many people in society. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages? v. 5
The well-developed global network has enabled the advent of online shopping. Instead of going to stores, people tend to do their shopping on the Internet. Therefore, Online purchase gradually becomes widespread. In this essay, I will demonstrate the process of an online order. Overall, there are three main steps to follow, starting with selecting the product and ending with shipping the order. Begin by connecting the Internet and entering the store. After opening the website, customers select the product that they want to buy based on some details such as colour, size and quantity if it is available. And then add it to the shopping cart to save in the system. If customers want to continue shopping, the next steps repeat as above. If they decide to complete the purchase, the process of checkout procedure is initiated. Buyers have to verify their order carefully before moving through the payment. In case something goes wrong, they can modify it before submitting. At the following stage, logging onto the account and confirming information is necessary before selecting the payment method such as credit card and check. If customers don't have an account, they can set up a new one by providing name, address and email. After that, they have to enter card information successfully or receive the check so as the order will be released to fulfilment. Then, consumers receive an email confirmation once the transaction is complete. The last step in the online order processing is shipped. After the goods are packed and sent to shipping, customers will receive the shipment notification. When the order is shipped, tracking information will be sent to them. Then, if the delivery is successful, the order will complete. Otherwise, the lost package will be tracked and resent as soon as possible. The next steps repeat as above until the shipping finishes. In conclusion, today more people are using the Internet to shop than ever before. This process has given us an easy, but also specific instruction on how to order online. It will help more people understand clearly this process and purchase effectively.
The well-developed global network has enabled the advent of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
.
Instead
of going to stores,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
tend to do their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
on the Internet.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Online
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
gradually
becomes widespread. In this essay, I will demonstrate the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
process
of an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
order
.
Overall
, there are three main
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
steps
to follow, starting with selecting the product and ending with shipping the order.

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Begin
by connecting the Internet and entering the store. After opening the website,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customers
select the product that they want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
based on
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
such as
Possible spelling mistake. 'colour' is British English.
colour
, size and quantity if it is available. And then
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
add
it to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
cart to save in the system. If
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customers
want to continue
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
, the
next
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
steps
repeat as above. If they decide to complete the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
process
of checkout procedure
is initiated
. Buyers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
verify their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
order
carefully
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
before
moving through the payment. In case something goes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
, they can modify it
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
before
submitting.

At the following stage, logging onto the account and confirming information is necessary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
before
selecting the payment method such as credit card and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
check
. If
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customers
don't have an account, they can set up a new one by providing name, address and email. After that, they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
enter card information
successfully
or receive the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
check
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
as the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
order
will
be released
to
Possible spelling mistake. 'fulfilment' is British English.
fulfilment
. Then, consumers receive an email confirmation once the transaction is complete.

The last
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
step
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
order
processing
is shipped
. After the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
are packed
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sent
to shipping,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customers
will receive the shipment notification. When the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
order
is shipped
, tracking information will be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sent
to them. Then, if the delivery is successful, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
order
will complete.
Otherwise
, the lost package will be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tracked
and resent as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
as possible. The
next
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
steps
repeat as above until the shipping finishes.

In conclusion
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are using the Internet to shop than ever
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
before
. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
process
has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
us an easy,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
specific instruction on how to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
order
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
. It will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
understand
clearly
this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
process
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
effectively
.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes
Language is not a genetic gift, it is a social gift. Learning a new language is becoming a member of the club – the community of speakers of that language.
Frank Smith

IELTS essay The use of social media is replacing face-to-face interaction among many people in society. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages? v. 5

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
348 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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