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The two graphs below show the percentage of smokes and the consumption of alcohol in litres in selected countries for the period 1960 2000 Summarize the information by choosing and reporting the key features and make any relevant comparisons v.1

The two graphs below show the percentage of smokes and the consumption of alcohol in litres in selected countries for the period 1960 2000
First school for a newborn is home and parents are the teachers. So it is pivotal that both the parents should be equally involved in their child development and help them to become a good citizen. I largely agree with this statement. Firstly, in today's fast-paced life where couples are working, it becomes impossible for the mother to look after the toddler and performing household chores alone, so it is the need of the hour that both parents should be indulged in kid Upbringing. To add further, if the mother is busy working than the father can pitch in and get himself involved in teaching the child and vice versa. Furthermore, the father can also share some responsibilities like getting them off the bed and dropping them to school, as a result, kids feel more connected to both the parents, which is very much essential to develop their intellectual skills and broaden their horizons. On the other hand, where child bringing is borne by the single parent only, it has been observed that after school hours, they spend most of their time on online sites and watching in appropriate Television programmes and playing fighting games like PUB-G where the idea is to kill the others in a virtual world. Therefore, results in aggressive behaviour and mental instability. To conclude, children upbringing is the one of the key factors in developing their personality and behavioural aspects and it is the need of the hour that the two should equally divide the duties and help their children to grow.
First
school for a newborn is home and
parents
are the teachers.
So
it is pivotal that both the
parents
should be
equally
involved in their child development and
help
them to become a
good
citizen.

I
largely
agree
with this statement.

Firstly
, in
today
's
fast
-paced life where couples are working, it becomes impossible for the mother to look after the toddler and performing household chores alone,
so
it is the need of the hour that both
parents
should
be indulged
in kid Upbringing. To
add
further
, if the mother is busy working than the father can pitch in and
get
himself involved in teaching the child and vice versa.
Furthermore
, the father can
also
share
some
responsibilities like getting them off the bed and dropping them to school,
as a result
, kids feel more connected to both the
parents
, which is
very
much essential to develop their intellectual
skills
and broaden their horizons.

On the other hand
, where child bringing
is borne
by the single
parent
only
, it has
been observed
that after school hours, they spend most of their time on online sites and watching in appropriate Television
programmes
and playing fighting games like PUB-G where the
idea
is to kill the others in a virtual world.
Therefore
, results in aggressive
behaviour
and mental instability.

To conclude
, children upbringing is the one of the key factors in developing their personality and
behavioural
aspects and it is the need of the hour that the two should
equally
divide the duties and
help
their children to grow.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay The two graphs below show the percentage of smokes and the consumption of alcohol in litres in selected countries for the period 1960 2000

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
257 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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