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The tradition that family gets together to eat meals is disappearing. What are the reasons? What are the impacts? v.3

The tradition that family gets together to eat meals is disappearing. What are the reasons? What are the impacts? v. 3
The norm of dining together with relatives is becoming extinct. This essay would first discuss the reasons and the implications of the extinction of family coming together to dine. Firstly, technology has played a big role in communication within relatives. In the good old days, dining together was a means of communication and a way to appreciate one another, but since the rise of social media like Facebook, re-uniting families by having meals together has begun to decline. Relatives now find it more comfortable to text rather than meeting in person. For example, families these days prefer to create group chats as a method of keeping in touch with one another. Secondly, the impact of this is that relatives do not get to meet for years, which results in a weak love bond. It is an established truth that there is love in sharing, eating together can help strengthen bonds within themselves but this has not been the case. The reduction in having meals together has resulted to lack of compassion and care towards one another. "The way to a person's heart is through their stomach", this is a popular saying. In recent years, relatives get only to meet each other over the internet and have no form of relationship in real life which has resulted in their division. For instance, Children from a monogamous family have better bonds together than children from polygamous families. In conclusion, social media like Whatsapp and Twitter has created a more comfortable way of communication in recent years as compared to meeting with one another and discuss over meals, although this has made communication better but has created more division in relatives.
The norm of dining together with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relatives
is becoming extinct. This essay would
first
discuss the reasons and the implications of the extinction of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
coming together to dine.

Firstly
, technology has played a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
role in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communication
within
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relatives
. In the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
days, dining together was a means of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communication
and a way to appreciate one another,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
since the rise of social media like Facebook, re-uniting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
by having meals together has begun to decline.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Relatives
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
find it more comfortable to text
rather
than meeting in person.
For example
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
these days prefer to create group chats as a method of keeping in touch with one another.

Secondly
, the impact of this is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relatives
do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
for years, which results in a weak
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
bond. It is an established truth that there is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
in sharing, eating together can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
strengthen bonds within themselves
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
this has not been the case. The reduction in having meals together has resulted to lack of compassion and care towards one another.
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
The way to a person's heart is through their stomach
Use a smart closing quote here: "”".
"
, this is a popular saying. In recent years,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relatives
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
each other over the internet and have no form of relationship in real life which has resulted in their division.
For instance
, Children from a monogamous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
have better bonds together than children from polygamous families.

In conclusion
, social media like
Possible spelling mistake found.
Whatsapp
and Twitter has created a more comfortable way of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communication
in recent years as compared to meeting with one another and discuss over meals, although this has made
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communication
better
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
has created more division in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relatives
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
14Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay The tradition that family gets together to eat meals is disappearing. What are the reasons? What are the impacts? v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
278 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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