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The standard of living is higher in urban areas than in the rural areas. To what extent it is true in your county? What steps should be taken to bring the life style at rural areas. v.1

The standard of living is higher in urban areas than in the rural areas. What steps should be taken to bring the life style at rural areas. v. 1
In this contemporary era, the world is changing by leaps and bounds. People move to metropolises from villages because of the globalization. The standard of living in the cities is much higher than the villages. It is also same in my country, but the quality of life in the rural areas is much better than the urban areas. There are a number of steps should be taken to bring the lifestyle at the villages. First and foremost, people have easy access to their basic amenities and they live more comfortable lives in the cities as compare to the villages. Also, the transportation services easily available, more convenient and faster in the metropolises. So, laymen can move easily in the cities. Due to, the advancement of technology, people of urban areas become smarter and broad minded. They are able to plan their future more effectively. Also, they are well educated so, they aware of the happenings around the world and surroundings as well. On the other hand, village life is simpler, generous and co-operative. People live in joint families where they respect their elders and they have strong emotional bonding with them. They have not only less basic needs, but also they have stress free lives as compared to city life. They co-operate with their neighbours in each and every work. These men work so hard in the fields that they are mentally strong enough to bear the stress and strains of life. For example, in many villages in Gujarat, people have to go miles to only fetch drinking water. The solutions of this situation are not so simple, the government should construct more new avenues in these areas for better communication with the towns. If the avenues are constructed, then industries would build some micro level plants in these areas because of this the village people would earn some valuable amount of money from the jobs. At last, the government should give subsidies to the village people foe establishment of micro scale businesses. To keep issues in the prospects, the government should develop the countryside, but the people of the countryside should not lose their originality totally. Owing to this, they have more moral values which city people have not.
In this contemporary era, the world is changing by leaps and bounds.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
to metropolises from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
villages
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the globalization. The standard of living in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
is much higher than the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
villages
. It is
also
same in my country,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the quality of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
in the rural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
is much better than the urban
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
. There are a number of steps should
be taken
to bring the lifestyle at the villages.

First
and foremost,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have easy access to their basic
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
amenities and
they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
more comfortable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
as compare to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
villages
.
Also
, the transportation services
easily
available, more convenient and faster in the metropolises.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, laymen can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
easily
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
. Due to, the advancement of technology,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
of urban
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
become smarter and
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
broad minded
. They are able to plan their future more
effectively
.
Also
, they are
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
well educated
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
, they aware of the happenings around the world and surroundings
as well
.

On the other hand
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
village
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
is simpler, generous and co-operative.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
in joint families where they respect their
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
elders and
they have strong emotional bonding with them. They have not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
less basic needs,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
they have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
as compared to city
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. They co-operate with their
Possible spelling mistake. 'neighbours' is British English.
neighbours
in each and every work. These
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
work
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
in the fields that they are mentally strong
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
to bear the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
and strains of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
For example
, in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
villages
in Gujarat,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
go miles to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
fetch drinking water.

The solutions of this situation are not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
simple, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should construct more new avenues in these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
for better communication with the towns. If the avenues
are constructed
, then industries would build
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
micro level plants in these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
because of this
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
village
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
would earn
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
valuable amount of money from the jobs. At last, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should give subsidies to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
village
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
foe establishment of micro scale businesses.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
issues in the prospects, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should develop the countryside,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
of the countryside should not lose their originality
totally
. Owing to this, they have more moral values which city
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have not.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
32Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Mistakes

IELTS essay The standard of living is higher in urban areas than in the rural areas. What steps should be taken to bring the life style at rural areas. v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
370 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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