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The quality of life in large cities is decreasing. What could be the reasons behind this? What measures can be taken to resolve this problem? v.6

The quality of life in large cities is decreasing. What could be the reasons behind this? What measures can be taken to resolve this problem? v. 6
It is believed that the quality of life in big cities is declining and people who live in big cities always complaint about numerous issues they face. The following essay will discuss some major reasons behind the issue, and some steps that people and government could do to resolve the problem. For a number of reasons, many people believe that the quality of life in cosmopolitan cities such as in New Delhi, London, Beijing, New York,   and Jakarta is degrading. Firstly, it is obvious that large cities have problems with traffic. As the population in big cities is growing rapidly each year, it means that the number of cars that commutes on streets is also increasing. The growing number of cars on streets and highways will definitely cause traffic congestion and impact on the air quality as well. Secondly, it is a fact that in many big cities such as in New York or Manila, the crime rate is considerably higher. Consequently, the local people do not feel safe when they walk in the park or in the subway station, as they could be robbed or injured anytime. Increasing living expenses, housing issues, and ever-increasing competition in workplaces are some other reasons for the degraded lifestyle in such big cities. The rapid growth of new supermalls, factories and offices in residential areas are also the reasons many people feel that the quality of life in big cities is decreasing. There are some solutions that governments and communities could consider to address the problem. One of them is that governments should provide decent and comfortable public transportation. By having a good public transportation system, it is hoped that people will choose to use public buses or trains rather than driving their own cars. As a result, it will reduce the traffic congestion and air pollution. Another solution is that government should add more policemen and install more surveillance videos in areas with high crime activities. By having more policemen and video recorders, criminals will think twice before they do any crime acts. Lastly, as existing big cities are overcrowded, governments should develop new residential and commercial areas. By having these new areas, it is hoped that some of the city people will move to new areas and reduce the density issue. Decentralisation of cities could be another effective solution to decrease the ever-increasing population in the cities. Finally, commercial areas should be kept far away from the residential areas and unplanned commercialisation in such areas should be prohibited. In conclusion, it is a fact that the quality of life in large cities is decreasing nowadays and it is mainly due to density, traffic, uncontrolled commercialisation and crime problems. However, there are some recommendations that governments could consider and apply. They should build a better public transportation system, add more security personnel and develop new areas. By doing these recommendations, it is hoped that the quality of life in big cities will get better.
It
is believed
that the
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quality
of
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life
in
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big
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cities
is declining and
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people
who
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live
in
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big
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cities
always complaint about numerous
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issues
they face. The following essay will discuss
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some
major
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reasons
behind the
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issue
, and
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some
steps that
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people
and
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government
could do to resolve the problem.

For a number of
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reasons
,
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many
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people
believe that the
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quality
of
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life
in cosmopolitan
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cities
such as in
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New
Delhi, London, Beijing,
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New
York,
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and Jakarta is degrading.
Firstly
, it is obvious that large
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cities
have problems with
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traffic
. As the population in
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big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
is growing
rapidly
each year, it means that the number of cars that commutes on streets is
also
increasing. The growing number of cars on streets and highways will definitely cause
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traffic
congestion and impact on the air
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quality
as well
.
Secondly
, it is a fact that in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
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big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
such as in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
New
York or Manila, the
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crime
rate is
considerably
higher.
Consequently
, the local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not feel safe when they walk in the park or in the subway station, as they could
be robbed
or injured anytime. Increasing living expenses, housing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issues
, and ever-increasing competition in workplaces are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
for the degraded lifestyle in such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
. The rapid growth of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
Possible spelling mistake found.
supermalls
, factories and offices in residential
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areas
are
also
the
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reasons
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
feel that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
in
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big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
is decreasing.

There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
solutions that
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governments
and communities could
The verb 'consider' is used with the gerund form: "consider addressing".
consider to address
the problem. One of them is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
governments
should provide decent and comfortable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
transportation. By having a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
transportation system, it
is hoped
that
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people
will choose to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
buses or trains
rather
than driving their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
cars.
As a result
, it will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
congestion and air pollution. Another solution is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
add
more policemen and install more surveillance videos in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
with high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
activities. By having more policemen and video recorders, criminals will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
twice
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
they do any
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crime
acts.
Lastly
, as existing
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big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
are overcrowded
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
governments
should develop
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
residential and commercial
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
. By having these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
, it
is hoped
that
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
some of the
city
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people
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the density
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issue
.
Possible spelling mistake. 'Decentralisation' is British English.
Decentralisation
of
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cities
could be another effective solution to decrease the ever-increasing population in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
.
Finally
, commercial
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areas
should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
kept
far away from the residential
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areas
and unplanned
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commercialisation
in such
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areas
should
be prohibited
.

In conclusion
, it is a fact that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
in large
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
is decreasing nowadays and it is
mainly
due to density,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
, uncontrolled
Possible spelling mistake. 'commercialisation' is British English.
commercialisation
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
problems.
However
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
recommendations that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
governments
could consider and apply. They should build a better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
transportation system,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
add
more security personnel and develop
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
. By doing these recommendations, it
is hoped
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
better.
12Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
82Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay The quality of life in large cities is decreasing. What could be the reasons behind this? What measures can be taken to resolve this problem? v. 6

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
493 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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