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The population in most cities is growing as people move to cities to find work and new opportunities. What problem does overpopulation in the cities cause? How can these problems be solved? v.2

The population in most cities is growing as people move to cities to find work and new opportunities. What problem does overpopulation in the cities cause? How can these problems be solved? v. 2
Overpopulation in the cities is increasingly becoming a social issue. This essay will elaborate the major problem such as the lack of basic necessities and suggest a viable solution of relocating the company’s operation. While it may be a challenge, it may definitely not impossible to achieve. The crucial problem of overcrowded cities is the issue of sustainability which includes lack of basic needs such as housing and clean water. This is because most of the cities are specifically designed to cater a designated number of people and will not be ready to be converted to mega cities. For instance, the Times Newspaper recently reported that the population of Sydney surpassed the average number of the required residents. In contrast, if its population is within the normal average range, the authorities will find it less difficult to provide shelter and portable water for everyone. The potential approach to tackling this issue is for the government to mandate businesses to move their manufacturing operations outside the city center. This will open the door of opportunities to rural areas as more jobs will be available and the need to move to cities will be discouraged. For example, the recent survey at the University of Queensland concluded that more respondents are likely to move to an area where they can find an employment. This clearly shows that if the employment opportunities are readily available within their location, people will not be attracted to live in the cities. In conclusion, although there are problems associated with overpopulation in the cities, these problems are not insurmountable. To address the issue, the government should adopt a long-term measure such as to relocate the plant operations of the company outside the city.
Overpopulation in the
cities
is
increasingly
becoming a social
issue
. This essay will elaborate the major
problem
such as the lack of
basic necessities
and suggest a viable solution of relocating the
company
’s operation. While it may be a challenge, it may definitely not impossible to achieve.

The crucial
problem
of overcrowded
cities
is the
issue
of sustainability which includes lack of basic needs such as housing and clean water. This is
because
most of the
cities
are
specifically
designed to cater a designated number of
people
and will not be ready to
be converted
to mega
cities
.
For instance
, the Times Newspaper recently reported that the population of Sydney surpassed the average number of the required residents.
In contrast
, if its population is within the normal average range, the authorities will find it less difficult to provide shelter and portable water for everyone.

The potential approach to tackling this
issue
is for the
government
to mandate businesses to
move
their manufacturing operations outside the city center. This will open the door of opportunities to rural areas as more jobs will be available and the need to
move
to
cities
will
be discouraged
.
For example
, the recent survey at the University of Queensland concluded that more respondents are likely to
move
to an area where they can find an employment. This
clearly
shows
that if the employment opportunities are
readily
available within their location,
people
will not
be attracted
to
live
in the cities.

In conclusion
, although there are
problems
associated with overpopulation in the
cities
, these
problems
are not insurmountable. To address the
issue
, the
government
should adopt a long-term measure such as to relocate the plant operations of the
company
outside the city.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
14Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay The population in most cities is growing as people move to cities to find work and new opportunities. What problem does overpopulation in the cities cause? How can these problems be solved? v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
285 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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