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The only way to reduce the amount of traffic in cities today is by reducing the need for people to travel from home for work, education or shopping. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.10

The only way to reduce the amount of traffic in cities today is by reducing the need for people to travel from home for work, education or shopping. v. 10
MODERN WORLD CHANGED OVER WAY OF COMMUTTING FROM ONE PLACE TO ANOTHER. WE PREFER TO USE MORE OUR CARS WHICH ARE COMFORTABLE AND FLEXIBLE. BUT, THESE CAN LEAD TO INCREASE TRAFFIC JAMS, ESPECIALLY IN BIG CITIES. IT IS SAID THAT, IT CAN BE REDUCED BY DIMINISHING THE NEED FOR TRAVELLING FOR PEOPLE SUCH AS TO REACH WORKPLACES, COLLEGES AND SHOPPING CENTERS. I BELIEVE, THIS IS NOT THE ONLY METHOD TO HANDLE THIS SITUATION, WHICH I WILL DISCUSS IN NEXT PARAGRAPHS. TO BEGIN WITH, PROBLEM RELATED TO TRAFFICS ON ROADS CANNOT ONLY BE SOLVED BY REDUCING THE DEMAND FOR PEOPLE. TO BE CLEAR, PEOPLE GO TO WORK, COLLEGES OR UNIVERSITIES AND SHOPPING MALLS. GOING TO THESE PLACES IS VERY IMPORTANT FOR THEM. FOR EXAMPLE, IF GOVERNMENT DO NOT LET THEM GO TO THEIR WORK THEN, HOW WILL THEY SUPPORT THEIR FAMILY ECONOMICALLY? , SAME FOR HIGH SCHOOLS AND SHOPS, HOW WILL CHILDREN LEARN AND GET THE FOOD THEY WISH. I THINK, THIS CANNOT HELP IN ANY WAYS BECAUSE TRAVELLING FOR THESE AREAS IS OUR FIRST NEED WHICH CANNOT TACKLE TRAFFICS. HOWEVER, THERE ARE SO MANY OTHER APPROACHES WHICH CAN HELP IN THE REDUCTION OF JAMS IN CITIES. FIRSTLY, AUTHORITIES CAN REDUCE THE AMOUNT FOR TICKETS FOR PUBLIC TRANSPORTS. IN THIS WAY, PEOPLE CAN ADOPT THESE TRANSPORTS THAN THEIR OWN VEHICLES. SECONDLY, THEY CAN INCREASE THE PRIZE FOR FUEL. IN OTHER WORDS, IF THE CARBURANT FOR CARS BECOME MORE EXPENSIVE THEN PEOPLE DO NOT SERVICE THEIR OWN VEHICLES TO REACH THEIR DESTINATIONS ATLEAST FOR SHORT DISTANCES. IN CONCLUSION, I TOTALLY DISAGREE WITH THE STATEMENT THAT ONLY THE REDUCTION FOR REACHING NEEDY PLACES LIKE JOBS, SCHOOLS, MALLS CAN HELP TO SOLVE THE PROBLEM WITH TRAFFICS ON ROADS IN CITIES, BECAUSE THESE AREAS ARE VERY IMPORTANT FOR OURS. WHILE, GOVERNMENT CAN USE OTHER METHODS LIKS INCREASING FUEL PRIZE AND REDUCING AMOUNT OF TICKETS.
MODERN WORLD
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
CHANGED
OVER WAY OF
Possible spelling mistake found.
COMMUTTING
FROM ONE PLACE TO ANOTHER. WE PREFER TO
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
USE
MORE OUR CARS WHICH ARE COMFORTABLE AND FLEXIBLE.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
BUT
, THESE CAN LEAD TO INCREASE TRAFFIC JAMS,
ESPECIALLY
IN
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
BIG
CITIES. IT
IS SAID
THAT, IT CAN BE
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
REDUCED
BY DIMINISHING THE NEED FOR TRAVELLING FOR
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
PEOPLE
SUCH AS TO REACH WORKPLACES, COLLEGES AND SHOPPING CENTERS. I BELIEVE, THIS IS NOT THE
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ONLY
METHOD TO HANDLE THIS SITUATION, WHICH I WILL DISCUSS IN
NEXT
PARAGRAPHS.

TO
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
BEGIN
WITH, PROBLEM RELATED TO TRAFFICS ON ROADS CANNOT
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ONLY
BE SOLVED
BY REDUCING THE DEMAND FOR
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
PEOPLE
. TO BE
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
CLEAR
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
PEOPLE
GO TO WORK, COLLEGES OR UNIVERSITIES AND SHOPPING MALLS. GOING TO THESE PLACES IS
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
VERY
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
IMPORTANT
FOR THEM.
FOR EXAMPLE
, IF
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
GOVERNMENT
DO NOT
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
LET
THEM GO TO THEIR WORK THEN, HOW WILL THEY SUPPORT THEIR FAMILY
ECONOMICALLY
?
Loose punctuation mark.
,
SAME FOR HIGH SCHOOLS AND SHOPS, HOW WILL CHILDREN LEARN AND
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
GET
THE FOOD THEY WISH. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
THINK
, THIS CANNOT
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
HELP
IN ANY WAYS
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
BECAUSE
TRAVELLING FOR THESE AREAS IS OUR
FIRST
NEED WHICH CANNOT TACKLE TRAFFICS.

HOWEVER
, THERE ARE
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
SO
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
MANY
OTHER APPROACHES WHICH CAN
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
HELP
IN THE REDUCTION OF JAMS IN CITIES.
FIRSTLY
, AUTHORITIES CAN
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
REDUCE
THE AMOUNT FOR TICKETS FOR PUBLIC TRANSPORTS. IN THIS WAY,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
PEOPLE
CAN ADOPT THESE TRANSPORTS THAN THEIR
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
OWN
VEHICLES.
SECONDLY
, THEY CAN INCREASE THE PRIZE FOR FUEL.
IN OTHER WORDS
, IF THE
Possible spelling mistake found.
CARBURANT
FOR CARS BECOME MORE EXPENSIVE
Did you mean "than"?
THEN
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
PEOPLE
DO NOT SERVICE THEIR
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
OWN
VEHICLES TO REACH THEIR DESTINATIONS
Possible spelling mistake found.
ATLEAST
FOR SHORT DISTANCES.

IN CONCLUSION
, I
TOTALLY
DISAGREE WITH THE STATEMENT THAT
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ONLY
THE REDUCTION FOR REACHING NEEDY PLACES LIKE JOBS, SCHOOLS, MALLS CAN
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
HELP
TO SOLVE THE PROBLEM WITH TRAFFICS ON ROADS IN CITIES,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
BECAUSE
THESE AREAS ARE
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
VERY
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
IMPORTANT
FOR OURS. WHILE,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
GOVERNMENT
CAN
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
USE
OTHER METHODS
Possible spelling mistake found.
LIKS
INCREASING FUEL PRIZE AND REDUCING AMOUNT OF TICKETS.
8.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8.5Mistakes
I love commuting between languages just like I love commuting between cultures and cities.
Elif Safak

IELTS essay The only way to reduce the amount of traffic in cities today is by reducing the need for people to travel from home for work, education or shopping. v. 10

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
309 words
8.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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