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The only way to reduce the amount of traffic in cities today is by reducing the need for people to travel from home to work, shopping and education. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.4

The only way to reduce the amount of traffic in cities today is by reducing the need for people to travel from home to work, shopping and education. v. 4
The most viable solution to the evergrowing traffic problem in urban areas, according to some, is to minimize the citizen's need for travel to workplaces, shopping malls and schools. However, I disagree with this viewpoint. Firstly, all jobs cannot be done from home. Doctors, engineers, nurses and many other professionals have to visit their workplaces to perform their jobs. Similarly, if we shop online, dispatch staff will still be on the road to deliver products. In addition to this, many professional courses require field studies and laboratory works and an online course cannot provide such facilities. Online courses cannot be compared with classroom teaching and the quality of the products cannot be judged just by the pictures on a laptop or a phone. Furthermore, if somebody is confined to one place for a long, he may develop health problems - diabetes, obesity, hypertension, weak eyesight are only a few to mention. To truly tackle the traffic congestion, we need more realistic solutions. One such solution can be improving the public transportation. The convenience of public conveyance would discourage many to use their private cars, which is the primary reason for bad traffic in many cities. Furthermore, the government can encourage cyclists to use this eco-friendly mode of transport more often by dedicating a separate lane for them. Many European and Asian cities, for example, already have separate cycle lanes and this has been truly effective in promoting environmentally friendly vehicles and reducing congestions. In conclusion, in order to minimize traffic jams, the authority should enhance mass transportation facilities and encourage people to use eco-friendly transports rather than planning to restrict people's movements.
The most viable solution to the
evergrowing
traffic
problem in urban areas, according to
some
, is to minimize the citizen's need for travel to workplaces, shopping malls and schools.
However
, I disagree with this viewpoint.

Firstly
, all jobs cannot
be done
from home. Doctors, engineers, nurses and
many
other professionals
have to
visit their workplaces to perform their jobs.
Similarly
, if we shop online, dispatch staff will
still
be on the road to deliver products.
In addition
to this,
many
professional courses require field studies and laboratory works and an online course cannot provide such facilities. Online courses cannot
be compared
with classroom teaching and the quality of the products cannot
be judged
just
by the pictures on a laptop or a phone.
Furthermore
, if somebody
is confined
to one place for a long, he may develop health problems
-
diabetes, obesity, hypertension, weak eyesight are
only
a few to mention.

To
truly
tackle the
traffic
congestion, we need more realistic solutions. One such solution can be improving the public transportation. The convenience of public conveyance would discourage
many
to
use
their private cars, which is the primary reason for
bad
traffic
in
many
cities.
Furthermore
, the
government
can encourage cyclists to
use
this eco-friendly mode of transport more
often
by dedicating a separate lane for them.
Many
European and Asian cities,
for example
, already have separate cycle lanes and this has been
truly
effective in promoting
environmentally
friendly vehicles and reducing congestions.

In conclusion
, in order to minimize
traffic
jams, the authority should enhance mass transportation facilities and encourage
people
to
use
eco-friendly transports
rather
than planning to restrict
people
's movements.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay The only way to reduce the amount of traffic in cities today is by reducing the need for people to travel from home to work, shopping and education. v. 4

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
272 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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