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The number of people who are at risk of serious health problems due to being over weight is increasing. What is the reason for the growth in overweight people in society. How can this problem be solved. v.2

The number of people who are at risk of serious health problems due to being over weight is increasing. What is the reason for the growth in overweight people in society. How can this problem be solved. v. 2
Nowadays obesity is becoming a major issue in society. Increase in weight may lead to cause serious diseases and even death. This essay will discuss the reasons and some solutions, which we can use them to overcome this issue. In this era time management has the highest priority, so people eat junk/fast food to save their precious time, and this habit will make them addict to the fast food. Some people just eat them because they are fond of it. This will make them lazy for cooking, and this habit will also reflect on their other activities too. They become lazy to do exercise, walking, working, which will stimulate the rate of increasing weight. For example, a recent research conducted at the University of Alberta claims that 70% of the people who are not getting adequate nutritions, become lethargic in their near future. Hopefully, we can prevent this by taking some steps against it. Firstly, The government should impose higher taxes on unhealthy edible items such as pizza, burger, ready made meal, etc. This may drop the sales of these kind of food items significantly. Secondly, some NGO should spread awareness by conducting seminars, events and printing banners. Government should give incentives to the person who is not having meals like these. For example, in China, the people who are not having unhealthy nutritions and physically fit, they have to pay less taxes in comparison to obese persons. To conclude, to stay happy and wealthy keeping body in shape is essential, which can be done by regular workout and acquiring enough and proper nourishment.
Nowadays obesity is becoming a major issue in society. Increase in weight may lead to cause serious diseases and even death. This essay will discuss the reasons and
some
solutions, which we can
use
them to overcome this issue.

In this era time management has the highest priority,
so
people
eat junk/
fast
food to save their precious time, and this habit will
make
them addict to the
fast
food.
Some
people
just
eat them
because
they are fond of it. This will
make
them lazy for cooking, and this habit will
also
reflect on their other activities too. They become lazy to do exercise, walking, working, which will stimulate the rate of increasing weight.
For example
, a recent research conducted at the University of Alberta claims that 70% of the
people
who are not getting adequate
nutritions
, become lethargic in their near future.

Hopefully
, we can
prevent
this by taking
some
steps against it.
Firstly
, The
government
should impose higher taxes on unhealthy edible items such as pizza, burger,
ready made
meal, etc. This may drop the sales of
these kind
of food items
significantly
.
Secondly
,
some
NGO should spread awareness by conducting seminars,
events
and printing banners.
Government
should give incentives to the person who is not having meals like these.
For example
, in China, the
people
who are not having unhealthy
nutritions
and
physically
fit, they
have to
pay less taxes
in comparison
to obese persons.

To conclude
, to stay happy and wealthy keeping body in shape is essential, which can
be done
by regular workout and acquiring
enough
and proper nourishment.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes
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IELTS essay The number of people who are at risk of serious health problems due to being over weight is increasing. What is the reason for the growth in overweight people in society. How can this problem be solved. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
264 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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