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The internet has made knowledge immediately available to people through computers and smartphones all around the world. Much of this knowledge is also free. Discuss the advantages and Disadvantages of this trend. v.5

The internet has made knowledge immediately available to people through computers and smartphones all around the world. Much of this knowledge is also free. Discuss the advantages and Disadvantages of this trend. v. 5
In this modern era, it has become difficult to teach regulation to the children. Some parents consider beating to be an effective way to train their children to obey rules. This essay will argue why smacking is completely unacceptable in the terms of train child discipline. To begin with, some parents believe that punishment is a perfect way to teach their children how to follow the rules. They are justifiably worried about teaching the rules to their children that could make them good human being. They naturally feel to make their kids educated. For instance, a recent survey describes that 90% parents admit that if they will punish their child physically, then there will be more chances for that kid to learn accurately and it will create a sense of fear, and they will do nothing wrong. These few instances have created an existing thought among parents that smacking their children is the best way in the terms to teach self-control to their kids. Despite these few reasons associated with smacking children, the idea that abuse is necessary is completely undesirable. Most of the children follow and imitate their elders. In case of a behavioural issue, smacking will not work. For example, if the parents always use punishment method to correct their children, then they will start hating them and it will affect their mental and behaviour development, and also as for every child his/her parents are the role models, so they follow them and they will start doing same with their youngest. Overall, the idea that smacking is necessary is dangerous itself and could lead to a far worse outcome for children as well as parents. To conclude, this essay argued that parents who are in the favour of punishment have a wrong understanding of smacking and underestimate the effects of what they believe. In my opinion, smacking is an entirely unnecessary if parents want to teach their children discipline.
In this modern era, it has become difficult to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teach
regulation to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
consider beating to be an effective way to train their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to obey
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
. This essay will argue why smacking is completely unacceptable in the terms of train child discipline.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
believe that punishment is a perfect way to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teach
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
how to follow the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
. They are
justifiably
worried about teaching the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
that could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
human being. They
naturally
feel to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
their kids educated.
For instance
, a recent survey
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
describes
that 90%
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
admit that if they will punish their child
physically
, then there will be more chances for that kid to learn
accurately
and it will create a sense of fear, and they will do nothing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
. These few instances have created an existing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
that smacking their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
is the best way in the terms to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teach
self-control to their kids.

Despite these few reasons associated with smacking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
that abuse is necessary is completely undesirable. Most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
follow and imitate their elders. In case of a
Possible spelling mistake. 'behavioural' is British English.
behavioural
issue, smacking will not work.
For example
, if the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
always
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
punishment method to correct their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
, then they will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
hating them and it will affect their mental and
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
development, and
also
as for every child his/her
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
are the role models,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they follow
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
them and
they will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
doing same with their youngest.
Overall
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
that smacking is necessary is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
itself and could lead to a far worse outcome for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
as well
as parents.

To conclude
, this essay argued that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
who are in the
Possible spelling mistake. 'favour' is British English.
favour
of punishment have a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
understanding of smacking and underestimate the effects of what they believe. In my opinion, smacking is an
entirely
unnecessary if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
want to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teach
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
discipline.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay The internet has made knowledge immediately available to people through computers and smartphones all around the world. Much of this knowledge is also free. Discuss the advantages and Disadvantages of this trend. v. 5

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
321 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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