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The internet has brought about many changes into our day to day life Nowadays we are doing things such as mailing contacting banking and communication much faster Do these developments have more advantages than disadvantages v.1

The internet has brought about many changes into our day to day life Nowadays we are doing things such as mailing contacting banking and communication much faster Do these developments have more advantages than disadvantages v. 1
Older people have immense knowledge and experience as compared to youngsters. Therefore, some people believe that anyone should be allowed to work after 60 while another thinks it should not be the case. I support the latter, which I will discuss in following paragraphs. On the one hand, older employees are capable of giving invaluable information about any subject matter as they have been around for years, so they have more knowledge about the industry, know the bigger picture of scenarios, and better emotional intelligence, which helps to tackle complicated issues in a shorter period. In addition to it, studies have proven that those who retire their health suddenly deteriorate, they become depressed, emotionally unstable and feel lonely. Being socially active and part of the community makes them to contribute more towards betterment of company or organization. Sometimes, these people prove to be a better teacher, as they have commercial experience as well as academic know-how. Subsequently, earning will support to them and their dependents. On the other hand, with age humans gets wiser, smarter and have wider knowledge. But this trend continues until a certain age, after that we go backward and start to forget everything. This is a human cycle, which has been same for centuries and it will remain the same because it is in our biological nature. Therefore, with time our cognitive abilities, analytical skills and memory gets weaker. Consequently, this affects the quality of work performed. Furthermore, technology is a new phenomenon and is changing the way businesses around the globe work. The older generation is reluctant to adopt new ways. Additionally, every organization has a hierarchical structure, where there are only limited seats available, either it will be occupied by older ones or younger one. It is quite expensive to retain employee who is at the top of the ladder than to hire a new university pass out. For example, my EVP’s salary is 25Lakh, while a Management executive earns 30, 000. In conclusion, older people should be respected, and we should ask them for guidance whenever we could, but I strongly believe that older people should vacate seats for our youth, they should be given the opportunity. This will balance the economy and society.
Older
people
have immense knowledge and experience as compared to youngsters.
Therefore
,
some
people
believe that anyone should be
allowed
to work after 60 while another
thinks
it should not be the case. I support the latter, which I will discuss in following paragraphs.

On the one hand,
older
employees are capable of giving invaluable information about any
subject matter
as they have been around for years,
so
they have more knowledge about the industry, know the bigger picture of scenarios, and better emotional intelligence, which
helps
to tackle complicated issues in a shorter period.
In addition
to it, studies have proven that those who retire their health
suddenly
deteriorate, they become depressed,
emotionally
unstable and feel lonely. Being
socially
active and part of the community
makes
them to contribute more towards betterment of
company
or organization.
Sometimes
, these
people
prove to be a better teacher, as they have commercial experience
as well
as academic know-how.
Subsequently
, earning will support to them and their dependents.

On the other hand
, with age humans
gets
wiser, smarter and have wider knowledge.
But
this trend continues until a certain age, after that we go backward and
start
to forget everything. This is a human cycle, which has been same for centuries and it will remain the same
because
it is in our biological nature.
Therefore
, with time our cognitive abilities, analytical
skills
and memory
gets
weaker.
Consequently
, this affects the quality of work performed.
Furthermore
, technology is a new phenomenon and is changing the way businesses around the globe work. The
older
generation is reluctant to adopt new ways.
Additionally
, every organization has a hierarchical structure, where there are
only
limited seats available, either it will
be occupied
by
older
ones or younger one. It is quite expensive to retain employee who is at the top of the ladder than to hire a new university pass out.
For example
, my
EVP
’s salary is 25Lakh, while a Management executive earns 30, 000.

In conclusion
,
older
people
should
be respected
, and we should ask them for guidance whenever we could,
but
I
strongly
believe that
older
people
should vacate seats for our youth, they should be
given
the opportunity. This will balance the economy and society.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay The internet has brought about many changes into our day to day life Nowadays we are doing things such as mailing contacting banking and communication much faster Do these developments have more advantages than disadvantages v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
371 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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