Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

In some parts of the world it is increasingly popular to research the history of one's own family. Why do people want to do this? Is it a positive or negative development? v.2

In some parts of the world it is increasingly popular to research the history of one's own family. Why do people want to do this? Is it a positive or negative development? v. 2
In today's society, water is one of the requirements of the human life owing to its importance with regard to the citizens of the developing countries and also developed countries. Nevertheless, the deficiency of clear water is the alarming issue today for the government in order to improve and solve; thus, my stance is that the water environment will turn lower in the future. In this essay, the rationales leading to this worrying practise as well as its measure will be examined in detail. From my point of view, water plays a vital role on supplying energy to people to learn and study as well as helping trees more developed; hence, we could not live without the clean water. The common rationales of water pollution have a connection with activities of humans, especially when many factories release untreated sewage and waste into rivers, channels, canals, seas, etc. People have damaged water bodies; simultaneously, the natural sources of water have been made more polluted by reasons of using chemicals, pesticides and fertilizers frequently. What is more, the perception of using water among citizens is limited, and many of them consider water as an abundant resource and do not know how to utilize in an economical way. Letting out garbage into the water is the adverse habit of human beings; accordingly, the resource of water will be jammed and dirty. In order to limit the short of water at the lowest level, the following solutions can be of great help. For the initial approach, it is essential that the states are accountable for imposing stricter laws on environmental protection, notably when any individuals or companies discharging untreated waste into water bodies, like rivers, channels and oceans, have to fined or punished severely. In addition, the authorities must take constant effort to invest advanced technologies in making water resources in nature become cleaner for human demands with respect to the responsibility of schools, the youth ought to be instructed they ways to utilise this valuable natural resource in an effective and economical way as well as to avoid polluting water. More importantly, adults had better set good role models for the children in terms of water protection via particular actions such as stopping throwing trash or stuff into rivers in place of collecting in for recycling purposes. As mentioned above, I can draw a conclusion that the causes of water shortages should not be overlooked. In order words, the inventions of government, school and family play a key role in saving water sources as well as generate the good living setting for the survival of animals and humans. The more each person has the perfect solutions to protect the water, the better benefits he or she will gain.
In
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
's society,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
is one of the requirements of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
life owing to its importance with regard to the citizens of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developing countries
and
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developed countries
.
Nevertheless
, the deficiency of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
is the alarming issue
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
for the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
and solve;
thus
, my stance is that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
environment will turn lower in the future. In this essay, the rationales leading to this worrying
Possible spelling mistake. 'practise' is British English.
practise
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
as its measure will
be examined
in detail.

From my point of view,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
plays a vital role on supplying energy to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to learn and study as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
as helping trees more developed;
hence
, we could not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
without the clean
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
. The common rationales of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
pollution have a connection with activities of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humans
,
especially
when
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
factories release untreated sewage and waste into rivers, channels, canals, seas, etc.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
have damaged
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
bodies;
simultaneously
, the natural sources of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
have
been made
more polluted by reasons of using chemicals, pesticides and fertilizers
frequently
.
What is more
, the perception of using
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
among citizens
is limited
, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
of them consider
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
as an abundant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
resource
and do not know how to utilize
Consider replacing "in an economical way" with the adverb for "economical"; e.g., "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
in an economical way
. Letting out garbage into the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
is the adverse habit of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
beings;
accordingly
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
resource
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
will
be jammed
and dirty.

In order to limit the short of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
at the lowest level, the following solutions can be of great
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
. For the initial approach, it is essential that the states are accountable for imposing stricter laws on environmental protection,
notably
when any individuals or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
discharging untreated waste into
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
bodies, like rivers, channels and oceans,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
fined or punished
severely
.
In addition
, the authorities
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
take constant effort to invest advanced technologies in making
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
resources in nature become cleaner for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
demands with respect to the responsibility of schools, the youth ought to
be instructed
Do not use a noun immediately after the pronoun 'they'. Use a verb or an adverb, or possibly some other part of speech.
they ways
to
Do not mix variants of the same word ('utilise' and 'utilize') within a single text.
utilise
this valuable natural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
resource
in an effective and economical way as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
as to avoid polluting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
. More
importantly
, adults had better set
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
role models for the children in terms of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
protection via particular actions such as stopping throwing trash or stuff into rivers in place of collecting in for recycling purposes.

As mentioned above, I can draw a conclusion that the causes of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
shortages should not
be overlooked
. In order words, the inventions of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
, school and family play a key role in saving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
sources as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
as generate the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
living setting for the survival of animals and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humans
. The more each person has the perfect solutions to protect the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
, the better benefits he or she will gain.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes
A man who knows two languages is worth two men.
French Proverb

IELTS essay In some parts of the world it is increasingly popular to research the history of one's own family. Why do people want to do this? Is it a positive or negative development? v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
455 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts