Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

The international community should do more to tackle the threat of global warming. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.2

The international community should do more to tackle the threat of global warming. v. 2
There is a controversial issue about who should deal with the problem of climate change. Some ecologists think that global society should take a responsibility for this, while some politicians disagree with them and suggest that every country should solve it alone. In this essay, I will consider both points of view and agrees with the idea of international involvement. Let us start with the reasons why some ecologists argue that global organizations should tackle global warming. The first reason is that joint efforts bring more results. It is hardly possible for developing countries on their own to deal with climate change, because unlike developed states, they can neither afford expensive technologies nor hire well-known ecologists, but with the financial help from global organizations, they can purchase equipment as well as employ experts. Another motive is a low chance of funding misuse. Many countries are receiving the help from developed countries to solve this problem, but they have not achieved any noticeable goals, mostly because some corrupted politicians use most of the money for their own advantage. However, some politicians state that international societies should not address the problem with climate change. They justify their opinion with the following arguments. Firstly, they may be unaware of regional specifics. Many international societies find it arduous to deal with climate alteration in some regions, since they have either their own geographic features or ways of economic development. For example, Kazakstan heavily depends on production of both oil and gas, which cannot be easily replaced by other industries. Secondly, the bureaucracy in international organizations often poses obstacles rather than a solution. Many joint ventures, which are founded to reduce global warming, often work ineffectively owing to their complexity in organization, so it often happens that local organizations work faster and more productively as long as they obtain monetary assistance abroad. In conclusion, even though some politicians say that each country has to solve the problem with climate alteration itself, I think that international organizations can solve this problem more effectively for the above mentioned arguments.
There is a controversial issue about who should deal with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
climate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
ecologists
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
global
society should take a responsibility for this, while
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
politicians
disagree with them and suggest that every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
solve
it alone. In this essay, I will consider both points of view and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agrees
with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
involvement.

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Let
us
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
with the reasons why
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
ecologists argue that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
global
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
organizations
should tackle
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
global
warming. The
first
reason is that joint efforts bring more results. It is hardly possible for developing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
on their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
to deal with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
climate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
unlike developed states, they can neither afford expensive technologies nor hire well-known ecologists,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
with the financial
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
global
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
organizations
, they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
equipment
as well
as employ experts. Another motive is a low chance of funding misuse.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
are receiving the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
from developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
solve
this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they have not achieved any noticeable goals,
mostly
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
corrupted
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
politicians
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
most of the money for their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
advantage.

However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
politicians
state that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
societies should not address the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
climate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
. They justify their opinion with the following arguments.
Firstly
, they may be unaware of regional specifics.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
societies find it arduous to deal with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
climate
alteration in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
regions, since they have either their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
geographic features or ways of economic development.
For example
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Kazakstan
heavily
depends on production of both oil and gas, which cannot be
easily
replaced by other industries.
Secondly
, the bureaucracy in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
organizations
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
poses obstacles
rather
than a solution.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
joint ventures, which
are founded
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
global
warming,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
work
ineffectively
owing to their complexity in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
organization
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
happens that local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
organizations
work faster and more
productively
as long as they obtain monetary assistance abroad.

In conclusion
,
even though
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
politicians
say that each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
solve
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
climate
alteration itself, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
organizations
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
solve
this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
more
effectively
for the above mentioned arguments.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
39Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay The international community should do more to tackle the threat of global warming. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
342 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts