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The importance of biodiversity is being more widely recognized as increasing numbers of species come under threat. What can be done to maintain biodiversity? v.2

The importance of biodiversity is being more widely recognized as increasing numbers of species come under threat. What can be done to maintain biodiversity? v. 2
As the past decades saw there was a tendency to pose a threat to the natural environment, the list of endangered species increased. Some maintain that people should embark on environmental protection to prevent animals and plants from extinction. In this essay, I will outline three ways in which governments, the public, and enterprises can tackle with this problem. One possible approach would be for the public to participate in an institution which dedicates in preservation. As people join in it, people will get more knowledge; thus, they will have more abilities to advocate and inspire others surrounding them in order that the resources increase for the institution to use to preserve. One drawback, however, is that this casts a doubt on the efficiency. An alternative approach would be to promote more enterprises involve. This action will contribute to a surge of the funds to preserve those species in the verge of extinction. Admittedly, it can help environmentalists greatly; however, the difficulty lies on the number of enterprises which involve. The most effective solution is for governments to formulate policies which are relevant to prevent an aggravation. Such practices not only would promote the awareness for the public, but also accelerate the efficiency. For instance, several countries reached a consensus about environmental protection; thus, they made an agreement, such as Paris agreement. The strategies outlined above: preservation, promotion, and above all prevention, can do much to reserve destruction that threatens the world's plants and animals. The practical benefits of doing so are well worth the cost.
As the past decades
saw
there was a tendency to pose a threat to the natural environment, the list of endangered species increased.
Some
maintain that
people
should embark on environmental protection to
prevent
animals and plants from extinction. In this essay, I will outline three ways in which
governments
, the public, and enterprises can tackle with this problem.

One possible approach would be for the public to participate in an institution which dedicates in preservation. As
people
join
in it,
people
will
get
more knowledge;
thus
, they will have more abilities to advocate and inspire others surrounding them in order that the resources increase for the institution to
use to
preserve. One drawback,
however
, is that this casts a doubt on the efficiency.

An alternative approach would be to promote more enterprises involve. This action will contribute to a surge of the funds to preserve those species in the verge of extinction.
Admittedly
, it can
help
environmentalists
greatly
;
however
, the difficulty lies on the number of enterprises which involve.

The most effective solution is for
governments
to formulate policies which are relevant to
prevent
an aggravation. Such practices not
only
would promote the awareness for the public,
but
also
accelerate the efficiency.
For instance
, several countries reached a consensus about environmental protection;
thus
, they made an agreement, such as Paris agreement.

The strategies outlined above: preservation, promotion, and
above all
prevention, can do much to reserve destruction that threatens the world's plants and animals. The practical benefits of doing
so
are well worth the cost.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay The importance of biodiversity is being more widely recognized as increasing numbers of species come under threat. What can be done to maintain biodiversity? v. 2

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
256 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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