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The graphs below show the types of music album purchased by people in Britain according to sex and age Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant v.2

The graphs below show the types of music album purchased by people in Britain according to sex and age
The bar charts illustrate the percentage of people in terms of gender and age purchasing Pop music, Rock music and Classical music. At first glance, it is evident that the most popular the kind of music is Rock music. It can be seen from the graphs that the proportion of men who buy music is higher than women in both three types of music. Specifically, there are about 22 percent of male buying Pop music and just under 15 percent of female purchasing one. The figures for Rock music are 27 percent and 18 percent respectively. For Classical music, the rate of men purchasing the music account for under one-tenth, while this percentage for women make approxinately 6 percent. According to age, people aging from 16-24 years old intend to buy Pop and Rock music, at 25 percent and around 30 percent respectively. They do not like Classical music, so which occupies at just under 2 percent. Similarly, Pop and Rock music purchased by approximately one-fifth and a quarter of people being from 35 to 44 years old, while the figure for Classical music only has 3 percent. By contrast, people over 45 years old prefer Classical music to others. Generally, people being from 25 – 34 years old like both three types of music, however they prefer Rock music than others.
The bar charts illustrate the percentage of
people
in terms of gender and age purchasing Pop
music
,
Rock
music
and
Classical
music
. At
first
glance, it is evident that the most popular the kind of
music
is
Rock
music.

It can be
seen
from the graphs that the proportion of
men
who
buy
music
is higher than women in both three types of
music
.
Specifically
, there are about 22
percent
of male buying Pop
music
and
just
under 15
percent
of female purchasing one. The figures for
Rock
music
are 27
percent
and 18
percent
respectively
. For
Classical
music
, the rate of
men
purchasing the
music
account for under one-tenth, while this percentage for women
make
approxinately
6 percent.

According to age,
people
aging from 16-24 years
old
intend to
buy
Pop and
Rock
music
, at 25
percent
and around 30
percent
respectively
. They do not like
Classical
music
,
so
which occupies at
just
under 2
percent
.
Similarly
, Pop and
Rock
music
purchased
by approximately one-fifth and a quarter of
people
being from 35 to 44 years
old
, while the figure for
Classical
music
only
has 3
percent
. By contrast,
people
over 45 years
old
prefer
Classical
music
to others.
Generally
,
people
being
from 25 – 34
years
old
like both three types of
music
,
however
they prefer
Rock
music
than others.
5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
45Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay The graphs below show the types of music album purchased by people in Britain according to sex and age

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
222 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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