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The government is spending a lot of money to discover life in other planets some people think that goverment isbwasting money and should spend more money on adressing problems of public. To what extent do you agree and disagree. v.1

The government is spending a lot of money to discover life in other planets some people think that goverment isbwasting money and should spend more money on adressing problems of public. v. 1
Government is pouring a huge amount of its finances to ravel the universe. According to some it is an absolute waste of resources and these should generously be utilized for public cause. I agree with this opinion and this essay will discuss how finances could better be spent for the country and why space exploration is not mandatory. To begin, it is argued by some that the government should invest more to tackle the public issues. I believe in the same because, we are surviving in a developing country in which more than half of the population is lacking in its basics like shelter, food, education, health and employment. So in present circumstances, it is the need of government to solely pay an attention to problems crucial to society’s well being and funnel all the assets to the down-to-earth projects such as education and health reforms. This will consequently contribute to public good. For instance, according to 2006 financial statistics of Pakistan, the government was spending 46% of its outlays on space exploration projects and only 20 % on public reforms, however later is more worthy than former. Furthermore, in my opinion there is no utmost need of revealing life on other space bodies because space venturing is an expansive project, which demands huge investment. A large range of equipment and resources are required to launch satellites in space and to collect information which is beyond the financial capacity of our country. For instance, a study conducted on total expenditure of NASA space exploration series concluded that nearly 400 million dollars are spent on single satellite launch from earth. Hence, this much expenditure is impossible for economically crippled states like us. In conclusion, wasting a bulk of finances on the universe exploration is pointless, instead this money should be devoted for productive activities that can elevate citizens’ standard of living
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Government
is pouring a huge amount of its finances to ravel the universe. According to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
it is an absolute waste of resources and these should
generously
be utilized
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
cause. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this opinion and this essay will discuss how finances could better
be spent
for the country and why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
space
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exploration
is not mandatory.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
, it
is argued
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should invest more to tackle the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
issues. I believe in the same
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
, we are surviving in a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developing country
in which more than half of the population is lacking in its basics like shelter, food, education, health and employment.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
in present circumstances, it is the need of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
to
solely
pay an attention to problems crucial to society’s
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
well being
and funnel all the assets to the down-to-earth projects such as education and health reforms. This will
consequently
contribute to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
.
For instance
, according to 2006 financial statistics of Pakistan, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
was spending 46% of its outlays on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
space
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exploration
projects and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
20 % on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
reforms,
however
later is more worthy than former.

Furthermore
, in my opinion there is no utmost need of revealing life on other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
space
bodies
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
space
venturing is an expansive project, which demands huge investment. A large range of equipment and resources
are required
to launch satellites in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
space
and to collect information which is beyond the financial capacity of our country.
For instance
, a study conducted on total expenditure of NASA
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
space
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exploration
series concluded that
nearly
400 million dollars
are spent
on single satellite launch from earth.
Hence
, this much expenditure is impossible for
economically
crippled states like us.

In conclusion
, wasting a bulk of finances on the universe
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exploration
is pointless,
instead
this money should
be devoted
for productive activities that can elevate citizens’ standard of living
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
18Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay The government is spending a lot of money to discover life in other planets some people think that goverment isbwasting money and should spend more money on adressing problems of public. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
309 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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