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The given line chart demonstrates the consumption of three spreads, during the period of 1981 to 2007. v.1

The given line chart demonstrates the consumption of three spreads, during the period of 1981 to 2007. v. 1
Nowadays, the requirements of social skills are necessary when you have a job interview, give a presentation about your plans and importantly to be a useful part of a huge community we are living now. Some people trust in our education or school training our son to be a good citizen. Otherwise, parents are taught to respond to teaching their child. Personally, I suppose that both teachers and parents are necessary and important. First of all, parents critically have an important role in the growth of the child. The behaviours of them really affect on how their daughter act in society. When a child does not have a full love when they are young, it is hard for them to learn to behave politely and generously with surrounding, which is important to be a good people in our society. For instance, according to Zing, criminals who are young may come from family struggles like study, violent, divorce or crime in the past. Secondly, school is believed widely to be the fastest way to learn knowledge and life skills when they are able to access a wider society with friends and teachers. However, in a theoretical education as Vietnam, students are very often to be taught Math and Literature more than how we solve the problem and cooperate with others. We can take an example in the records of school violence in Vietnam last month. A thousand cases of that, according to VTV, are because of the lack of school control and frequently in using violent in both teachers and students, which will harm to their contribution in the community. Overall, both schools and parents should cooperate and try to help our younger generation to be respectful and responsible in their own community.
Nowadays, the requirements of social
skills
are necessary when you have a job interview,
give
a presentation about your plans and
importantly
to be a useful part of a huge community we are living
now
.
Some
people
trust in our education or
school
training our son to be a
good
citizen.
Otherwise
,
parents
are taught
to respond to teaching their child.
Personally
, I suppose that both teachers and
parents
are necessary and
important
.

First of all
,
parents
critically
have an
important
role in the growth of the child. The
behaviours
of them
really
affect
on how their daughter act in society. When a child does not have a full
love
when they are young, it is
hard
for them to learn to behave
politely
and
generously
with surrounding, which is
important
to be a
good
people
in our society.
For instance
, according to Zing, criminals who are young may
come
from family struggles like study, violent, divorce or crime in the past.

Secondly
,
school
is believed
widely
to be the fastest way to learn knowledge and life
skills
when they are able to access a wider society with friends and teachers.
However
, in a theoretical education as Vietnam, students are
very
often
to
be taught
Math and Literature more than how we solve the problem and cooperate with others. We can take an example in the records of
school
violence in Vietnam
last month
. A thousand cases of that, according to
VTV
, are
because
of the lack of
school
control and
frequently
in using violent in both teachers and students, which will harm to their contribution in the community.

Overall
, both
schools
and
parents
should cooperate and try to
help
our younger generation to be respectful and responsible in their
own
community.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay The given line chart demonstrates the consumption of three spreads, during the period of 1981 to 2007. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
292 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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