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The gap between rich and poor is increasing. What problems does it cause? What solutions can you suggest? v. 3

Over the years, the dichotomy between the upper and the lower class has been on the rise. This essay will explore capitalism and corruption as two major reasons and proffer possible measures to mitigate the situation. To start with causes, one of the obvious catalyst to the widening gap between the high and the low is capitalism. This is a system which continuously enriches the highly placed at the disadvantage of the other. For instance, it is the wealthy that have the power to acquire properties and own businesses due to their elevated access to funding and the elites who are mostly the political figures in the realm of affairs. As a result, this advantage easily lends credence to riches, thus placing them above the ordinary persons who continues to crawl with no support. Another vital point to consider is that of corruption. A reason is that the political leaders often show tendencies to greed and this leads to the them possibly abusing their power and likely feeding fat on national treasure while the others languish in abject poverty. There are two effective remedies to the above challenges, the first of which is the introduction of communal governing process by the head of states. This is important because it will forestall the initial discussed issue and enable equitable distribution of resources. To illustrate, the Chinese system of leadership where everyone is one is a good example. Another measure to combat the latter concern is that portfolio holders must be accountable and ensure that everybody is adequately catered for. If this can be achieved, basic amenities will be available and opportunities to take bribe will be eliminated. Consequently, the society will harmoniously grow and be free of potential practices that may create differences. In conclusion, although modern property economy and self-enrichment are major causes of variation in citizenship status, this can be improved if the leaders can ensure equity and selflessness between all. I believe it will help bridge the rising gap between the duo and install greatness and a feeling of togetherness which is important for national growth and development.

IELTS essay The gap between rich and poor is increasing. What problems does it cause? What solutions can you suggest? v.3

Over the years, the dichotomy between the upper and the lower
class
has been on the rise. This essay will explore capitalism and corruption as two major reasons and proffer possible measures to mitigate the situation. To
start
with causes, one of the obvious catalyst to the widening gap between the high and the low
is
capitalism. This is a system which
continuously
enriches the
highly
placed at the disadvantage of the other.
For instance
, it is the wealthy that have the power to acquire properties and
own
businesses due to their elevated access to funding and the elites who are
mostly
the political figures in the realm of affairs.
As a result
, this advantage
easily
lends credence to riches,
thus
placing them above the ordinary persons who
continues
to crawl with no support. Another vital point to consider is that of corruption. A reason is that the political leaders
often
show
tendencies to greed and this leads to
the them
possibly
abusing their power and likely feeding
fat
on national treasure while the others languish in abject poverty. There are two effective remedies to the above challenges, the
first
of which is the introduction of communal governing process by the head of states. This is
important
because
it will forestall the initial discussed issue and enable equitable distribution of resources. To illustrate, the Chinese system of leadership where everyone is one is a
good
example. Another measure to combat the latter concern is that portfolio holders
must
be accountable and ensure that everybody is
adequately
catered for. If this can
be achieved
, basic amenities will be available and opportunities to take bribe will
be eliminated
.
Consequently
, the society will
harmoniously
grow and be free of potential practices that may create differences.
In conclusion
, although modern property economy and self-enrichment are major causes of variation in citizenship status, this can be
improved
if the leaders can ensure equity and selflessness between all. I believe it will
help
bridge the rising gap between the duo and install greatness and a feeling of togetherness which is
important
for national growth and development.
6Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes
Essay
4 paragraphs
350 words
9
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resources: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Band score ≥ 7
  • Band score ≤ 6
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