Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Some people think that the government should take care of disadvantaged people such as the unemployed and homeless people. What is the cause of the problem? v. 2

In the modern world, many people are willing to help disadvantaged people, as these individuals cannot survive without the assistance of the rich and affluent people. However, others feel that there are should not be any assistance, as people should run their livelihood by themselves. Personally, I believe that poor people should be motivated by the authorities. On the one hand, it is true that the main cause of this problem is unemployment. In this regard, many cannot afford many things. Furthermore, economic instability is the second reason why many citizens are not able to earn money. To illustrate, due to the high prices of properties, some people are living in the streets. Thirdly, the process of globalization has caused many problems for unskilled people, as big companies and organizations are willing to employ a well-qualified worker. On the other hand, it is clear that there are some people who are not keen to provide support for the unemployed and homeless people. They tend to think that the government should concentrate on other challenges such as health care and education. Moreover, some people believe that if the authorities provide the support for these people, they will not start working, as they are not willing to earn money. For instance, many people who have no property, are indolent people. In conclusion, although many people reckon to think that there is no point to support these people, others feel that the government should take care of these people. In this case, I believe that the government should provide the job for these individuals. Accordingly, they should take up working, as they are supposed to earn money for their family and relatives.

IELTS essay Some people think that the government should take care of disadvantaged people such as the unemployed and homeless people. What is the cause of the problem? To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.2

In the modern world,
many
people
are willing to
help
disadvantaged
people
, as these individuals cannot survive without the assistance of the rich and affluent
people
.
However
, others feel that there are should not be any assistance, as
people
should run their livelihood by themselves.
Personally
, I believe that poor
people
should
be motivated
by the authorities. On the one hand, it is true that the main cause of this problem is unemployment. In this regard,
many
cannot afford
many
things.
Furthermore
, economic instability is the second reason why
many
citizens are not able to earn money. To illustrate, due to the high prices of properties,
some
people
are living in the streets.
Thirdly
, the process of globalization has caused
many
problems for unskilled
people
, as
big
companies
and organizations are willing to employ a well-qualified worker. On the
other
hand, it is
clear
that there are
some
people
who are not keen to provide support for the unemployed and homeless
people
. They tend to
think
that the
government
should concentrate on
other
challenges such as health care and education.
Moreover
,
some
people
believe that if the authorities provide the support for these
people
, they will not
start
working, as they are not willing to earn money.
For instance
,
many
people
who have no property, are indolent
people
.
In conclusion
, although
many
people
reckon to
think
that there is no point to support these
people
, others feel that the
government
should take care of these
people
.
In this case
, I believe that the
government
should provide the job for these individuals.
Accordingly
, they should take up working, as they
are supposed
to earn money for their family and relatives.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
17Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes
Essay
4 paragraphs
279 words
9
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resources: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Band score ≥ 7
  • Band score ≤ 6
Similar essay posts: