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The first car appeared on British roads in 1888. By the year 2000 there may be as many as 29 million vehicles on British roads. Alternative forms of transport should be encouraged and international laws introduced to control car ownership and use. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.29

The first car appeared on British roads in 1888. By the year 2000 there may be as many as 29 million vehicles on British roads. Alternative forms of transport should be encouraged and international laws introduced to control car ownership and use. v. 29
The emerging growth of motor vehicles around the globe has forced people to promote alternative means of transportation as well as to introduce international policies. I completely agree with this statement because this may be a major step to control growing road issues and to promote productive means of transportation. First of all, car ownership is increasing rapidly, which has caused a lot of traffic problems and road accidents. In other words, people are constantly depending upon motor vehicles for most of their activities, thus creating vehicle congestion within a city. When laws are introduced to maintain ownership of cars within each family of a society, this will halt people from owning private vehicles. As a result, traffic congestion can be solved to a better extent. For example, if a rule stating one car per family is introduced, the increasing figure of vehicle can be controlled. Secondly, encouraging alternative means of transportation will result in reduction of cars and increase the usage of effective commuting methods. That is to mean, people will look out for other available methods like trains and cable-buses. Consequently, this will help people to forget about owning a car since trains are productive in terms of saving money and time. For instance, 80% of the population in Japan use trains, which has helped their government to manage traffic on public roads. In conclusion, I strongly believe that a government should promote other means of transportation as they aids to prevent people from buying motor vehicles which are really not productive if compared with above alternatives.
The emerging growth of motor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
around the globe has forced
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to promote alternative
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
means
of transportation
as well
as to introduce international policies. I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this statement
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
this may be a major step to control growing road issues and to promote productive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
means
of transportation.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
ownership is increasing
rapidly
, which has caused
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
traffic problems and road accidents.
In other words
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are
constantly
depending upon motor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
for most of their activities,
thus
creating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicle
congestion within a city. When laws
are introduced
to maintain ownership of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
within each family of a society, this will halt
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from owning private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
.
As a result
, traffic congestion can
be solved
to a better extent.
For example
, if a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rule
stating one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
per family
is introduced
, the increasing figure of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicle
can
be controlled
.

Secondly
, encouraging alternative
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
means
of transportation will result in reduction of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
and increase the usage of effective commuting methods.
That is
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mean
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will look out for other available methods like trains and cable-buses.
Consequently
, this will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to forget about owning a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
since trains are productive in terms of saving money and time.
For instance
, 80% of the population in Japan
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
trains, which has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helped
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
to manage traffic on public roads.

In conclusion
, I
strongly
believe that a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should promote other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
means
of transportation as they
The pronoun 'they' must be used with a non-third-person form of a verb: "aid"
aids
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from buying motor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
which are
really
not productive if compared with above alternatives.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay The first car appeared on British roads in 1888. By the year 2000 there may be as many as 29 million vehicles on British roads. Alternative forms of transport should be encouraged and international laws introduced to control car ownership and use. v. 29

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
259 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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