Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

The first car appeared on British roads in 1888. By the year 2000 there may be as many as 29 million vehicles on British roads. Alternative forms of transport should be encouraged and international laws introduced to control car ownership and use. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.18

The first car appeared on British roads in 1888. By the year 2000 there may be as many as 29 million vehicles on British roads. Alternative forms of transport should be encouraged and international laws introduced to control car ownership and use. v. 18
Since 1888, cars drive on British streets and in 2000 we already had 29 million vehicles in Britain. Some people think, that alternative transportation forms should be encouraged and vehicle and it would be good to control ownership and use by international laws. This essay agrees with this approach and wants to point out some reasons. First of all, using less cars and going by bike or foot will enhance our health. People often use their vehicle for short distances which can easily be used for physical activity. For instance, I know dwellers of suburbs which could easily use their bikes for their daily way to work, but it is way more comfortable to drive by car, so they choose taking that. Nowadays, we sit all day it would enhance our health when we would just use our feet to go to work. If the government would use vehicle usage controls, most people would start to ride their bike more often because mostly, it is easy to do it. The second reason is the protection of our environment. Car emissions produce a lot of CO2 and furthers climate change. Most of the time, people don’t take public transportation like bus or train, which would be much more sustainable, because it is very expensive. For example, the one-way train between Graz and Linz costs 40 euros. That’s why many students borrow their parent’s car, even if sustainability is important for them, because it is much cheaper. Encouraging public transportation by making them cheaper would motivate people to use them more often and protect our environment. To conclude, furthering alternative forms of transportation would enhance human’s health and the environment. Often, people are just too lazy to use their bike, which can be counteracted by controlling the use of vehicles. Moreover, making public transportation cheaper would be a great incentive for a higher use of them.
Since 1888,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
drive on British streets and in 2000 we already had 29 million
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
in Britain.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
, that alternative
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
forms should
be encouraged
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicle
and it would be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
to control ownership and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
by international laws. This essay
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agrees
with this approach and wants to point out
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
reasons.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, using
Did you mean "fewer"? The noun cars is countable.
less
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
and going by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bike
or foot will enhance our health.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
often
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicle
for short distances which can
easily
be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for physical activity.
For instance
, I know dwellers of suburbs which could
easily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bikes
for their daily way to work,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it is way more comfortable to drive by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they choose taking that. Nowadays, we sit all day it would enhance our health when we would
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
our feet to go to work. If the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicle
usage controls, most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
to ride their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bike
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
often
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
mostly
, it is easy to do it.

The second reason is the protection of our environment.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Car
emissions produce
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
CO2 and furthers climate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
. Most of the time,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
don’t take public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
like bus or train, which would be much more sustainable,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
expensive.
For example
, the one-way train between Graz and Linz costs 40 euros. That’s why
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
students borrow their parent’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
, even if sustainability is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for them,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it is much cheaper. Encouraging public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
by making them cheaper would motivate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
them more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
often
and protect our environment.

To conclude
, furthering alternative forms of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
would enhance human’s health and the environment.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Often
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
too lazy to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bike
, which can
be counteracted
by controlling the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
.
Moreover
, making public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
cheaper would be a great incentive for a higher
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of them.
6Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
29Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay The first car appeared on British roads in 1888. By the year 2000 there may be as many as 29 million vehicles on British roads. Alternative forms of transport should be encouraged and international laws introduced to control car ownership and use. v. 18

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
314 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts