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The diagram below shows information about quartely profit for three companies of united states from 2005 to 2007. v.1

The diagram below shows information about quartely profit for three companies of united states from 2005 to 2007. v. 1
Recent years have witnessed a fresh generation with flourishing knowledge. While some suggest that this knowledge derives from the carefully planned curriculum set by the authorities, others believe that teaching plans should be laid out by the educators. Conspicuously, this issue requires our in-depth analysis. For a start, government authorities advocate that they should be in charge of planning curriculums. Such important guideline must be standardised, as it is only fair for students to receive equal knowledge through schools. To illustrate, every pupil under a standardised system will have minimal effect from the quality of teachers, since it is a requirement to satisfy the goals in such system. Nonetheless, this method contains several loopholes, including the fact that similar instruction plans do not feature the talents of learners. Bill Gates is a flawless illustration, where, in school, was incapable of expanding his incredible business mindset. It was not until he dropped out of Harvard that his ability of operating a company entered into the limelight. In stark contrast, however, teachers and principals believe that laying out plans for study should be conducted by those who spend time educating the youngsters. That teacher can develop more flexible curriculums are undeniable. They are capable of exhibiting each students’ positives, being the ones who comprehend their learning style. Moreover, the educators physically teach a class, indicating they have experience in handling numerous study styles and habits. Take UCLA, for instance, renowned for its expertise in education, refuses to increase class sizes to ensure quality education and for professors and tutors to truly understand the undergraduates. However, the numerous downsides to this proposal exist, hence the reason for authorities in the modern day to craft the curriculum. It is or paramount importance that students receive equally beneficial education, which cannot be achieved with this measure. Skills of students, as a result, will fluctuate greatly among the nation, further segregating the educated and uneducated. In conclusion, by and large the authorities should remain as the ones to write up practice contents, while teachers should be free to shift minor details to personalize a study for their students. All can only be achieved through an act of cooperation, to improve and assist the upcoming generation.
Recent years have witnessed a fresh generation with flourishing knowledge. While
some
suggest that this knowledge derives from the
carefully
planned
curriculum
set by the
authorities
, others believe that teaching plans should
be laid
out by the educators.
Conspicuously
, this issue requires our in-depth analysis.

For a
start
,
government
authorities
advocate that they should be in charge of planning
curriculums
. Such
important
guideline
must
be
standardised
, as it is
only
fair
for
students
to receive equal knowledge through schools. To illustrate, every pupil under a
standardised
system will have minimal effect from the quality of
teachers
, since it is a requirement to satisfy the goals in such system. Nonetheless, this method contains several loopholes, including the fact that similar instruction plans do not feature the talents of learners. Bill Gates is a flawless illustration, where, in school, was incapable of expanding his incredible business mindset. It was not until he dropped out of Harvard that his ability of operating a
company
entered into the limelight.

In stark contrast,
however
,
teachers
and principals believe that laying out plans for study should
be conducted
by those who spend time educating the youngsters. That
teacher
can develop more flexible
curriculums
are undeniable. They are capable of exhibiting each
students’
positives, being the ones who comprehend their learning style.
Moreover
, the educators
physically
teach a
class
, indicating they have experience in handling numerous study styles and habits. Take UCLA,
for instance
, renowned for its expertise in education, refuses to increase
class
sizes to ensure quality education and for professors and tutors to
truly
understand the undergraduates.
However
, the numerous downsides to this proposal exist,
hence
the reason for
authorities
in the modern day to craft the
curriculum
. It is or paramount importance that
students
receive
equally
beneficial education, which cannot
be achieved
with this measure.
Skills
of
students
,
as a result
, will fluctuate
greatly
among the nation,
further
segregating the educated and uneducated.

In conclusion
, by and large the
authorities
should remain as the ones to write up practice contents, while
teachers
should be free to shift minor
details
to personalize a study for their
students
. All can
only
be achieved
through an act of cooperation, to
improve
and assist the upcoming generation.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay The diagram below shows information about quartely profit for three companies of united states from 2005 to 2007. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
369 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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