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The cost of flying has decreased significantly over the last decade This has made overseas travel much more accessible Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this trend v.1

The cost of flying has decreased significantly over the last decade This has made overseas travel much more accessible Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this trend v. 1
Interpersonal skills, play a vital role in any business, and it is mandatory for all employees to excel in them. However, a few employers found that their recruits lack in carrying out these skills efficiently. This essay will discuss the main causes of lack of interpersonal skills are being nervous and feeling superior to others. This essay will also suggest possible solutions including socializing and treating everyone equally. New employees are usually nervous around their peers; particularly around their managers. In order to prove they are worthy, they are more cautious while performing their duties. Moreover, a few people in the higher cadre presume that they are superior to everyone in all aspects and tend to ignore the suggestions from their associates. Consequently, newbies are not open for discussion. For instance, when I first joined a corporate firm, I was very nervous around my teammates and did not interact with them better. Because of my poor networking skills, I lost my promotion. These factors often influence employers to think that their new employees lack the essential interpersonal skills needed. Employees shall learn to socialize more with others, new joiners in particular. It aids in developing one's personality. Furthermore, they tend to develop cooperative skills. Also, employees ought to learn to treat others equally. In a competitive environment, fair treatment is of utmost importance for the well being of a business. For example, as per the recent statistics of Oracle, the performance of their employees has risen significantly when they are treated fair and working in a calm environment. Therefore, in order to improve interpersonal skills, one must learn to interact and respect others. To summarize, in order for a business to succeed their employees shall incorporate interpersonal skills. This essay discussed how interpersonal skills could be lacking by nervousness and superiority. This essay also suggested that the solutions to this problem are twofold: to communicate well with others and fair treatment.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Interpersonal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
, play a vital role in any business, and it is mandatory for all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
to excel in them.
However
, a few employers found that their recruits lack in carrying out these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
efficiently
. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
essay
will discuss the main causes of lack of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interpersonal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
are being nervous and feeling superior to others. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
essay
will
also
suggest possible solutions including socializing and treating everyone
equally
.

New
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
are
usually
nervous around their peers;
particularly
around their managers. In order to prove they are worthy, they are more cautious while performing their duties.
Moreover
, a few
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in the higher cadre presume that they are superior to everyone in all aspects and tend to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ignore
the suggestions from their associates.
Consequently
, newbies are not open for discussion.
For instance
, when I
first
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
joined
a corporate firm, I was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
nervous around my teammates and did not interact with them better.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
of my poor networking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
, I lost my promotion. These factors
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
influence employers to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that their new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
lack the essential
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interpersonal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
needed.

Employees shall learn to socialize more with others, new joiners
in particular
. It aids in developing one's personality.
Furthermore
, they tend to develop cooperative
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
.
Also
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
ought to learn to treat others
equally
. In a competitive environment,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fair
treatment is of utmost importance for the
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
well being
of a business.
For example
, as per the recent statistics of Oracle, the performance of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
has risen
significantly
when they
are treated
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fair
and working in a calm environment.
Therefore
, in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interpersonal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
, one
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
learn to interact and respect others.

To summarize
, in order for a business to succeed their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
shall incorporate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interpersonal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
essay
discussed how
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interpersonal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
could be lacking by nervousness and superiority. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
essay
also
suggested that the solutions to this problem are twofold: to communicate well with others and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fair
treatment.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay The cost of flying has decreased significantly over the last decade This has made overseas travel much more accessible Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this trend v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
321 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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