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The cost of flying has decreased significantly over the last decade This has made overseas travel much more accessible Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this trend v.2

The cost of flying has decreased significantly over the last decade This has made overseas travel much more accessible Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this trend v. 2
Nowadays one of the most popular means of transport is the airplane, and the number of passengers who take this kind of transport is increasing every year. As a matter of fact, in the last ten year the cost of flying has fallen considerably and for this reason, many people can afford a ticket to visit a foreign country. This essay will argue the benefits and drawbacks of this situation. There are so many advantages that I can point out when the cost of flying has decreased. First of all, the lower cost would allow people to visit frequently relatives who live in a remote area. In fact, there are a lot of families who have left their hometown for work and do not often see their relatives. Second, fly tickets become more affordable for people who never had the opportunity to buy one. People can travel overseas and visit a paradisiac beach, for instance. These reasons show how traveling by plane can contribute a closer relationship between relatives as well as allowing more people to travel to another country and contribute to tourism. Although there are some benefits when the cost has dropped, there are relevant disadvantages to point out. Firstly, If more people travel overseas It would be much more likely to get a virus or another disease from. It is the case of coronavirus and other illnesses bring from other countries by passengers. Secondly, with a higher number of passengers, we could see a crowded airport, especially in a small airport. Crowded airport produces chaos, mess and bad mood among people, such as Santiago Airport during the summer season. In short, these disadvantages put in evidence that lower cost brings some issues as well. This essay argued both the advantages and disadvantages of how the lower cost of flying produces an increase in the number of passengers who go overseas. In conclusion, while there are a lot of benefits, the disadvantages should be taken into account.
Nowadays one of the most popular means of transport is the airplane, and the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
passengers
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
take this kind of transport is increasing every year. As a matter of fact, in the last ten year the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cost
of flying has fallen
considerably
and
for this reason
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can afford a ticket to visit a foreign country. This essay will argue the benefits and drawbacks of this situation.

There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
advantages that I can point out when the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cost
of flying has decreased.
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, the lower
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cost
would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to visit
frequently
relatives
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in a remote area. In fact, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
families
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
their hometown for work and do not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
their relatives. Second,
fly
tickets become more affordable for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
never had the opportunity to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
one.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
can travel overseas and visit a
Possible spelling mistake found.
paradisiac
beach,
for instance
. These reasons
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
how traveling by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plane
can contribute a closer relationship between relatives
as well
as allowing more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to travel to another country and contribute to tourism.

Although there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
benefits when the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cost
has dropped, there are relevant disadvantages to point out.
Firstly
, If more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
travel overseas It would be much more likely to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a virus or another disease from. It is the case of coronavirus and other illnesses bring from other countries by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
passengers
.
Secondly
, with a higher number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
passengers
, we could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
a crowded
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
airport
,
especially
in a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
airport
. Crowded
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
airport
produces chaos, mess and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
mood among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, such as Santiago
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Airport
during
Consider using "summer".
the summer season
. In short, these disadvantages put in evidence that lower
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cost
brings
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
issues
as well
.

This essay argued both the advantages and disadvantages of how the lower
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cost
of flying produces an increase in the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
passengers
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
go overseas.
In conclusion
, while there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
benefits, the disadvantages should
be taken
into account.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
26Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes
Language is the road map of a culture. It tells you where its people come from and where they are going.
Rita Mae Brown

IELTS essay The cost of flying has decreased significantly over the last decade This has made overseas travel much more accessible Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this trend v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
329 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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