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The chart below shows the proportion of renewable energy in total enrgy supply in 4 countries from 1997 to 2010Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. v.1

The chart below shows the proportion of renewable energy in total enrgy supply in 4 countries from 1997 to 2010
Daily engagement of man in various activities concerning the environment has lead to crucial consequences such as death of species and undesirable level of biodiversity. Analysing the causes of loss of biodiversity which is environmental pollution, as well as continuous farming will prove this. Also, ways to ameliorate these problems will be discussed. To begin, the ecology of plants and animals is highly threatened by environmental pollutants which is mostly carbon and other less harmful elements like nitrogen. Many species are being lost today due to high CO saturation in the atmosphere. To clarify, the use of fossil fuel, deforestation and disposing of trash in water bodies, are human practices that reduce the level of oxygen even in the water bodies. This, activities endanger the lives of living organisms. Therefore, a number of species are lost in the endangered environment. Furthermore, farm lands are always tilled causing the extinction of beneficial organisms. Continuous farming is widely practiced leading to erosion and loss of soil nutrient. Likewise, fishing, people continue to fish in a particular river without considering the adverse effect of these unceasing practices. The government has a role to play in curbing these unhealthy activities that endanger the ecosystem. First, people should be encouraged to use public transport. This way, there will be fewer cars, also air and noise pollution will drastically reduce. Secondly, there should be some sort of regulations and law enforcements on farming and fishing practices. Thus, reducing the dangers imposed on the affected species. Finally, logging should be highly prohibited. Trees should be allowed to grow and there should be a reward for planting trees. In conclusion, man-made problems affecting the environment adversely can be curtailed with the political will.
Daily engagement of
man
in various activities concerning the environment has lead to crucial consequences such as death of species and undesirable level of biodiversity.
Analysing
the causes of loss of biodiversity which is environmental pollution,
as well
as continuous farming will prove this.
Also
, ways to ameliorate these problems will
be discussed
.

To
begin
, the ecology of plants and animals is
highly
threatened by environmental pollutants which is
mostly
carbon and other less harmful elements like nitrogen.
Many
species are
being lost
today
due to high CO saturation in the atmosphere. To clarify, the
use
of fossil fuel, deforestation and disposing of trash in water bodies, are human practices that
reduce
the level of oxygen even in the water bodies. This, activities endanger the
lives
of living organisms.
Therefore
, a number of species
are lost
in the endangered environment.
Furthermore
, farm lands are always tilled causing the extinction of beneficial organisms. Continuous farming is
widely
practiced leading to erosion and loss of soil nutrient.
Likewise
, fishing,
people
continue to fish in a particular river without considering the adverse effect of these unceasing practices.

The
government
has a role to play in curbing these unhealthy activities that endanger the ecosystem.
First
,
people
should
be encouraged
to
use
public transport. This way, there will be fewer cars,
also
air and noise pollution will
drastically
reduce
.
Secondly
, there should be
some
sort of regulations and law
enforcements on
farming and fishing practices.
Thus
, reducing the
dangers
imposed on the
affected
species.
Finally
, logging should be
highly
prohibited. Trees should be
allowed
to grow and there should be a reward for planting trees.

In conclusion
,
man
-made problems affecting the environment
adversely
can
be curtailed
with the political will.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
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IELTS essay The chart below shows the proportion of renewable energy in total enrgy supply in 4 countries from 1997 to 2010

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
285 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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