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The chart below show how frequently people in the USA ate in fast food restaurants between 2003 and 2013. v.1

The chart below show how frequently people in the USA ate in fast food restaurants between 2003 and 2013. v. 1
All living organisms are impacted by the environmental problems. It is often argued that the authorities should take responsibility to reduce environmental issues while some believe that it should be combined efforts by both the individuals and the government. I completely concur with the idea that masses with the support of the authorities should protect the atmosphere. The essay will elaborate on the environmental problems with the measures to be taken by the citizens and the administration. The first and major reason behind environmental degradation is overpopulation as well as injudicious use of natural resources. Increase in population has led to several consequences like greater consumption of food, land, and other resources that impact both the people and the environment. Additionally, due to rapid development and industrialization more soil, water, and air pollution happen. Thus, it cannot be entirely controlled by the governmental policies, humans should proactively make efforts in their routine life to save the ecosystem. Other major concerns are emission of harmful gases, deforestation, climate change which can be minimized by raising awareness among people. Recycling and increased use of renewable energy sources can be an effective way to conserve natural resources. People should reduce the use of fossil fuels because they discharge harmful gases which affect the climate causing greenhouse effects and global warming. Considering such issues people should come forward to preserve natural habitat with the support the government rules and regulations. To conclude, I my opinion, erosion of soil, water, land, and other resources can be optimized by the collaboration of citizens along with governments. The government should acknowledge alarming causes to the public and provide regulations to flourish the habitats.
All living organisms
are impacted
by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
problems. It is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
argued that the authorities should take responsibility to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
issues while
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
believe that it should
be combined
efforts by both the individuals and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
. I completely concur with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
that masses with the support of the authorities should protect the atmosphere. The essay will elaborate on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
problems with the measures to
be taken
by the citizens and the administration.

The
first
and major reason behind
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
degradation is overpopulation
as well
as injudicious
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of natural resources. Increase in population has led to several
The usual preposition to use after "consequences" is not "like". Did you mean "consequences of", "consequences for", or "consequences on"?
consequences like
greater consumption of food, land, and other resources that impact both the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and the environment.
Additionally
, due to rapid development and industrialization more soil, water, and air pollution happen.
Thus
, it cannot be
entirely
controlled by the governmental policies, humans should
proactively
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
efforts in their routine life to save the ecosystem.

Other major concerns are emission of harmful gases, deforestation, climate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
which can
be minimized
by raising awareness among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. Recycling and increased
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of renewable energy sources can be an effective way to conserve natural resources.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of fossil fuels
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they discharge harmful gases which affect the climate causing greenhouse effects and global warming. Considering such issues
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
forward to preserve natural habitat with the support the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
and regulations.

To conclude
, I my opinion, erosion of soil, water, land, and other resources can
be optimized
by the collaboration of citizens along with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
governments
. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should acknowledge alarming causes to the public and provide regulations to flourish the habitats.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes
It is astonishing how much enjoyment one can get out of a language that one understands imperfectly.
Basil Lanneau Gildersleeve

IELTS essay The chart below show how frequently people in the USA ate in fast food restaurants between 2003 and 2013. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
276 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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