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The table below shows the numbers of visitor to ashdowm. Museum during the year before and the year after it was refurbished. the charts show the result of surveys asking visitors how satisfied they were with their visit, during the same two period the sam v.1

The table below shows the numbers of visitor to ashdowm. Museum during the year before and the year after it was refurbished. the charts show the result of surveys asking visitors how satisfied they were with their visit, during the same two period the sam v. 1
Although it is often thought by some individuals that the best strategy to stimulate people to work more is through compensation which is based on their productivity and sales however, others think otherwise. In my opinion, I agree that payment for work output and marketing is vital as it increases employee's dedication and improves financial outcome for the organisation. Firstly, having a good remuneration system for people based on their product deliverables is one essential way to achieving a motivated team. In other words, when employees are conscious of the fact that they will receive more rewards, this increases their desire to put in extra effort to work. For example, the decision reached with the management of Wenger Plastics to reward staff for exceeding company's quarterly production target, led to the rise in the level of commitment of the workforce which was evident throughout the year. Secondly, setting marketing targets and rewarding employees who achieve or surpass them will indirectly increase a company's profitability. In fact, the rise in production output and trading which is triggered by the company's compensation plan will translate to better financial performance. One vivid example is the aggressive sales of Nigeria's most popular herbal drink called Aso Bitters which achieved a monthly average record of 102% distribution rate making it the most widely sold beverage in the country. Ultimately, this led to the impressive gains for the enterprise. In conclusion, even though there are several ways to motivate people, it is my opinion that the most effective way to achieve this is by output based reward, which drives workforce dedication and enhancement of organisation's profit.
Although it is
often
thought
by
some
individuals that the best strategy to stimulate
people
to work more is through compensation which
is based
on their productivity and sales
however
, others
think
otherwise
. In my opinion, I
agree
that payment for work output and marketing is vital as it increases employee's dedication and
improves
financial outcome for the
organisation
.

Firstly
, having a
good
remuneration system for
people
based on their product deliverables is one essential way to achieving a motivated team.
In other words
, when employees are conscious of the fact that they will receive more rewards, this increases their desire to put in extra effort to work.
For example
, the decision reached with the management of
Wenger
Plastics to reward staff for exceeding
company
's quarterly production target, led to the rise in the level of commitment of the workforce which was evident throughout the year.

Secondly
, setting marketing targets and rewarding employees who achieve or surpass them will
indirectly
increase a
company
's profitability. In fact, the rise in production output and trading which
is triggered
by the
company
's compensation plan will translate to better financial performance. One vivid example is the aggressive sales of Nigeria's most popular herbal drink called
Aso
Bitters which achieved a monthly average record of 102% distribution rate making it the most
widely
sold beverage in the country.
Ultimately
, this led to the impressive gains for the enterprise.

In conclusion
,
even though
there are several ways to motivate
people
, it is my opinion that the most effective way to achieve this is by output based reward, which drives workforce dedication and enhancement of
organisation
's profit.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes
A different language is a different vision of life.
Federico Fellini

IELTS essay The table below shows the numbers of visitor to ashdowm. Museum during the year before and the year after it was refurbished. the charts show the result of surveys asking visitors how satisfied they were with their visit, during the same two period the sam v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
270 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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