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the charts below shows how frequently people in the USA ate in fast food restaurants between 2003 and 2013 v.1

the charts below shows how frequently people in the USA ate in fast food restaurants between 2003 and 2013 v. 1
Alternative medicine is not new. It is accepted that it pre-dates conventional medication and it is still used by many people all over the world. I am unconvinced that it is dangerous, and feel that both different and conventional medications can be useful. There are several reasons why the conventional medical community is often dismissive of alternatives. Firstly, there has been little scientific research in such pharmaceutical, so there is a scarcity of evidence to support the claims of their supporters. Furthermore, people often try such treatment because of recommendations from friends, and therefore come to the therapist with a very positive attitude, which may be part of the reason for the cure. Moreover, these therapies are usually only useful for long-term, chronic conditions. Acute medical problems, such as accidental injury, often require more conventional methods. On the other hand, there remain strong arguments for the use of alternatives. Despite the lack of scientific proof, there is a lot of anecdotal evidence to suggest that these therapies work. In addition, far from being dangerous, they often have few or no side effects, so the worst outcome would be no change. One of the strongest arguments for the effectiveness of different therapies in the West is that, whilst conventional pharmaceutical is available without charge, many people are prepared to pay considerable sums for alternatives. If they were totally unhelpful, it would be surprising if this continued. I strongly believe that conventional pharmaceutical and different therapies can and should coexist. They have different strengths, and can both be used effectively to target particular medical problems. The best situation would be for different therapies to be used to support and complement conventional pharmaceutical.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Alternative
medicine is not new. It is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
accepted
that it
Possible spelling mistake found.
pre-dates
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
conventional
medication and it is
still
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
all over the world. I
am unconvinced
that it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
, and feel that both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
conventional
medications can be useful.

There are several reasons why the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
conventional
medical community is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
often
dismissive of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
alternatives
.
Firstly
, there has been
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
scientific research in such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pharmaceutical
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
there is a scarcity of evidence to support the claims of their supporters.
Furthermore
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
often
try such treatment
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of recommendations from friends, and
therefore
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
to the therapist with a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
attitude, which may be part of the reason for the cure.
Moreover
, these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
therapies
are
usually
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
useful for long-term, chronic conditions. Acute medical problems, such as accidental injury,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
often
require more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
conventional
methods.

On the other hand
, there remain strong arguments for the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
alternatives
. Despite the lack of scientific proof, there is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
anecdotal evidence to suggest that these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
therapies
work.
In addition
, far from being
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
, they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
often
have few or no side effects,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
the worst outcome would be no
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
. One of the strongest arguments for the effectiveness of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
therapies
in the West is that, whilst
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
conventional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pharmaceutical
is available without charge,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are prepared
to pay considerable sums for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
alternatives
. If they were
totally
unhelpful, it would be surprising if this continued.

I
strongly
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
conventional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pharmaceutical
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
therapies
can and should coexist. They have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
strengths, and can both be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
effectively
to target particular medical problems. The best situation would be for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
therapies
to be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to support and complement
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
conventional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pharmaceutical
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
As a hawk flieth not high with one wing, even so a man reacheth not to excellence with one tongue.
Roger Ascham

IELTS essay the charts below shows how frequently people in the USA ate in fast food restaurants between 2003 and 2013 v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
280 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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