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The breakthroughs in medical science are by far the most significant advances in world society over the last two centuries Discuss the statement and give your opinion v.4

The breakthroughs in medical science are by far the most significant advances in world society over the last two centuries Discuss the statement and give your opinion v. 4
It is argued that the advancement of medical knowledge is among the most effective improvements in the world in the last two centuries. I believe that development in medical science has so many beneficial impacts; therefore, it can be impressive progress. This essay discusses this idea. In the past, medical knowledge was not able to help and cure all kinds of patients. In fact, the number of dead patients was so notable. There were various kinds of diseases leading people to serious health problems. Furthermore, health issues had significant impacts on society and mainly on the economic. For example, most of the families wanted many children because they were expecting that one or some of them may die by disease. It is a well-established fact that the high number of children in a family can have adverse impacts on family economics. However, by the advancement of medical science, most of the health problems are solved. As a result, the number of dead patients is decreased significantly, and the rate of hope in life is increased. New medical knowledge has helped to diagnose and cure som many diseases at the early stages. For instance, there were so many people suffering from influenza, but now it is not a dangerous disease. Moreover, families have fewer children these days, which has positive impacts on family economics. In light of thoughts elaborated upon, it can be concluded that the development in medical science is the most improvement of humankind based on the significant impacts on the society and life of people. As mentioned, it should be noted that I agree with this idea, and I think the advancement of medical information is the most improvement in the last years.
It
is argued
that the advancement of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
knowledge is among the most effective improvements in the world in the last two centuries. I believe that development in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
science has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
beneficial
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
impacts
;
therefore
, it can be impressive progress. This essay discusses this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
.

In the past,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
knowledge was not able to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
and cure all kinds of patients. In fact, the number of dead patients was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
notable. There were various kinds of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
diseases
leading
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to serious health problems.
Furthermore
, health issues had significant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
impacts
on society and
mainly
on the economic.
For example
, most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
wanted
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
children
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they were expecting that one or
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
of them may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
die
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
disease
. It is a well-established fact that the high number of children in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
can have adverse
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
impacts
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
economics.

However
, by the advancement of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
science, most of the health problems
are solved
.
As a result
, the number of dead patients
is decreased
significantly
, and the rate of hope in life
is increased
. New
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
knowledge has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helped
to diagnose and cure
Possible spelling mistake found.
som
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
diseases
at the early stages.
For instance
, there were
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
suffering from influenza,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
it is not a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
disease
.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
have fewer children these days, which has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
impacts
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
economics.

In light of thoughts elaborated upon, it can
be concluded
that the development in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
science is the most improvement of humankind based on the significant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
impacts
on the society and life of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
. As mentioned, it should
be noted
that I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
, and I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
the advancement of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
information is the most improvement in the last years.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
21Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay The breakthroughs in medical science are by far the most significant advances in world society over the last two centuries Discuss the statement and give your opinion v. 4

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
285 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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