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The best way to improve health is to exercise daily. To what extent do you agree? v.1

The best way to improve health is to exercise daily. v. 1
Some people believe that performing exercise on a regular basis is the most effective solution in improving one's health status and I agree with the claim as this can lead to physical improvements and better mental well-being. To begin with, doing daily exercise will aid in burning calories from eating unhealthy food. Isometric exercises produce muscle contractions through repetitive motions that can produce caloric burning. In other words, the energy needed to perform certain physical activities will eventually turn excess fats into body fuel. In effect, this will produce weight loss and decrease the risk for getting obese, which is the primary risk factor of certain diseases. Moreover, this will helps in improving blood circulation in our body. Blood is one of the vital vehicle that delivers the relevant components such as oxygen and vitamins to certain organs. Performing exercise regularly will improve blood circulation by helping the blood flow smoothly in the arteries and veins towards the necessary our vital organs such as the heart and kidneys. Hence, the incidence of people suffering from deadly diseases like Diabetes Mellitus and Hypertension will eventually decline. Lastly, doing exercise does not only affect our body but also our mental health. Physical activities have an effect in brain alertness related to blood and oxygen perfusion, and mental focus. Activities the require repetition and counting, like exercise, will train our minds to focus on ensuring that we are doing the right way and frequency. Therefore, exercise will improve our mental well-being as our body benefit physically. In conclusion, I believe that doing regular exercise is the best way in achieving optimal health.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that performing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
on a regular basis is the most effective solution in improving one's health status and I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the claim as this can lead to physical improvements and better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mental
well-being.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
doing
daily
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
will aid in burning calories from eating unhealthy food. Isometric
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercises
produce muscle contractions through repetitive motions that can produce caloric burning.
In other words
, the energy needed to perform certain physical activities will
eventually
turn excess fats into
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
body
fuel. In effect, this will produce weight loss and decrease the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
for getting obese, which is the primary
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
factor of certain diseases.

Moreover
, this will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
in improving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
blood
circulation in our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
body
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Blood
is one of the vital vehicle that delivers the relevant components such as oxygen and vitamins to certain organs. Performing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
regularly
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
blood
circulation by helping the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
blood
flow
smoothly
in the arteries and veins towards the necessary our vital organs such as the heart and kidneys.
Hence
, the incidence of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
suffering from deadly diseases like Diabetes Mellitus and Hypertension will
eventually
decline.

Lastly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
doing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
does not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
affect our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
body
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mental
health. Physical activities have an effect in brain alertness related to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
blood
and oxygen perfusion, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mental
focus. Activities the
The word 'require' is not a noun. Did you mean "requirement"?
require
repetition and counting, like
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
, will train our minds to focus on ensuring that we are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
doing
the right way and frequency.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mental
well-being as our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
body
benefit
physically
.

In conclusion
, I believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
doing
regular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
is the best way in achieving optimal health.
12Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
25Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
A man who knows two languages is worth two men.
French Proverb

IELTS essay The best way to improve health is to exercise daily. v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
269 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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