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The best way to deal with the rising traffic and transportation is to encourage people to live in cities rather than in suburbs or in the countryside. To what extent do you agree or diagree with this option? v.1

The best way to deal with the rising traffic and transportation is to encourage people to live in cities rather than in suburbs or in the countryside. v. 1
When discussing the issue of increased traffic and transportation problems one should bear in mind the complexity of the issue. Some believe that encouraging people to move to bigger cities will not change traffic, becuase by increasing the popluation we increase the amount of cars used. Others, Including my self, agree with the above statement and think that people should move to major cities in order to avoid access use of cars. In this essay, I will provide examples and reasons to support my opinion. One argument in favour of my opinion is that people who live in big cities can use public transportation that is not accessible in rural areas. This has been shown in a poll performed among the inhabitants of New York state. In the poll more than 50% of the people living in New York city reported using public transportation instead of cars for work, in comparison to people living in small cities, which reported only 20% use of public transportation. This shows that people who live in major cities can use the local infrastructure instead of cars, which directly decrease traffic. Another point to support my opinion is that when living in big cities, all the local needs are near by and therefore people do not use their cars. For example, families living in the Negev, the southern most part of Israel, need to drive 15 miles in order to arrive to the nearest hospital. As a result there are daily traffic jams surrounding the hospital. This is contrast to Tell Aviv, where the hospital is located in the city center and people can walk, instead of driving. In conclusion I agree with the above statement, and think that encouraging people to live in big cities is a good way to address the rising traffic. If we all live close, we can use other means of transportation, which will help us to decrease traffic and save our environment.
When discussing the issue of increased
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
problems one should bear in mind the complexity of the issue.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
believe that encouraging
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
to bigger
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
will not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
becuase
by increasing the
Possible spelling mistake found.
popluation
we increase the amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
. Others, Including my self,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the above statement and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
to major
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
in order to avoid access
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
. In this essay, I will provide examples and reasons to support my opinion.

One argument in
Possible spelling mistake. 'favour' is British English.
favour
of my opinion is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
that is
not accessible in rural areas. This has
been shown
in a poll performed among the inhabitants of New York state. In the poll more than 50% of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in
If the term is a proper noun, use initial capitals.
New York city
reported using public
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transportation
instead
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
for work,
in comparison
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
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cities
, which reported
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
20%
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
. This
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
that
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people
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
in major
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
the local infrastructure
instead
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
, which
directly
decrease traffic.

Another point to support my opinion is that when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
, all the local needs are
Did you mean "nearby"?
near by
and
therefore
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people
do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
.
For example
, families
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living
in the Negev, the southern most part of Israel, need to drive
Writing for an international audience? Consider adding the metric equivalent.
15 miles
in order to arrive to the nearest hospital.
“As” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
As
a result there are daily
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traffic
jams surrounding the hospital. This is contrast to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Tell
Possible spelling mistake found.
Aviv
, where the hospital
is located
in the city center and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can walk,
instead
of driving.

In
The comma is probably missing here: "conclusion, I".
conclusion I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the above statement, and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that encouraging
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
way to address the rising
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
. If we all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
close, we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
other means of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
, which will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
us to decrease
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
and save our environment.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
39Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9Mistakes

IELTS essay The best way to deal with the rising traffic and transportation is to encourage people to live in cities rather than in suburbs or in the countryside. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
323 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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