Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Tell me something about your secondary school Which subject did you find most difficult at school why Do you ever need that subject now Why Why not What did you enjoy about being a school student v.1

Tell me something about your secondary school Which subject did you find most difficult at school why Do you ever need that subject now Why Why not What did you enjoy about being a school student v. 1
Due to the inevitably fast changing world and the continuous need to sustain business and personal necessities, it becomes customary for people to work harder and stay longer in their workplace. This essay will tackle both the benefits and detriments of this which will cite personal experiences as well. One of the advantages of working overtime is that people may specialize quickly and eventually become experts in their field of work or profession. As a result, it would allow a better chance for fast promotion, hence, would provide a huge financial help to support their family or personal needs. For example, during my first year with my current company, I used to spend a lot of overtime work due to volumes of workloads and hectic deadlines to meet, considering that there were less workforce in our team. As I stay in the office most of the time, I easily learned the process which helps me get promoted to a Senior role within just a year. On the other hand, having no work-life balance has also many drawbacks. Firstly, quality time to spend with the family is being compromised, thus, it may affect the relationship and bond that they have. Secondly, people have lesser time to do recreational activities, hobbies or something they are passionate about, other than work. As a matter of fact, when people have the ability to be more productive on other things that they really love, more often than not, it opens doors for other opportunities and self-fulfilment. For instance, as I worked very hard for my office deliverables, I tend to neglect to spend time with my hobbies like gardening. I always thought of making a business out of it, but because of the demand of work, I often must choose to use my little spare time to have a good rest and stay well, instead of doing my hobbies. In summary, the notable advantages of spending too much time at work is it will help people’s chance to rapidly move up the corporate ladder and will provide a better financial support. However, the disadvantages would be lesser time with family and do other productive recreations or hobbies which might lead to future opportunities.
Due to the
inevitably
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
changing world and the continuous need to sustain business and personal necessities, it becomes customary for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
harder and stay longer in their workplace. This essay will tackle both the benefits and detriments of this which will cite personal experiences
as well
.

One of the advantages of working overtime is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
may specialize
quickly
and
eventually
become experts in their field of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
or profession.
As a result
, it would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
a better chance for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
promotion,
hence
, would provide a huge financial
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to support their family or personal needs.
For example
, during my
first
year with my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to spend
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
overtime
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
due to volumes of workloads and hectic deadlines to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
, considering that there were less workforce in our team. As I stay in the office most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
, I
easily
learned the process which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
me
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
promoted to a Senior role within
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
a year.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, having no work-life balance has
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
drawbacks.
Firstly
, quality
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to spend with the family is
being compromised
,
thus
, it may affect the relationship and bond that they have.
Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have lesser
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to do recreational activities, hobbies or something they are passionate about,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
. As a matter of fact, when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have the ability to be more productive on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
things that they
really
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
, more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
than not, it opens doors for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
opportunities and
Possible spelling mistake found.
self-fulfilment
.
For instance
, as I worked
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
for my office deliverables, I tend to neglect to spend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with my hobbies like gardening. I always
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
of making a business out of it,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the demand of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
, I
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
choose to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
my
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
spare
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to have a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
rest and stay well,
instead
of doing my hobbies.

In summary, the notable advantages of spending too much
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
is it will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
chance to
rapidly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
up the corporate ladder and will provide a better financial support.
However
, the disadvantages would be lesser
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with family and do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
productive recreations or hobbies which might lead to future opportunities.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
To learn a language is to have one more window from which to look at the world.
Chinese Proverb

IELTS essay Tell me something about your secondary school Which subject did you find most difficult at school why Do you ever need that subject now Why Why not What did you enjoy about being a school student v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
368 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts