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Television dominates the free-time of too many people. It can make people lazy and prevent them from socializing with others. Do you agree or disagree? v.13

Television dominates the free-time of too many people. It can make people lazy and prevent them from socializing with others. v. 13
One of the most conspicuous trends in today's world is television. Some people believe that television is stopping people from socializing with fellow neighbours. On the other hand, others argue that television can connect people with the virtual world through interactive programs. As such, there are both merits and demerits for this trend. In my view, I strongly agree that watching television is killing our leisure time and it leads to laziness. Firstly, watching television can cut ourselves from the rest of the world. Many people are watching television programs and becoming fat by avoiding daily exercise routine. However, teenagers are affected by this activity and parents are worried about their declining social skills. For instance, a recent survey reported that most high school students' are no longer interested in playing outdoor games in the evening and wish to watch television all day. Needless to say, watching television can affect our lifestyle and communication skills. Secondly, a possible solution for this trend is to allocate time for every aspect of life and try to socialize with neighbours. Moreover, over watching television can lead to poor eye vision and most people are suffering from poor vision. For example, researchers suggested that kids are having poor vision because of television watching. Hence, people should reassess their daily routine and try to socialize with neighbours to enhance their communication skills. In conclusion, change is the essence of nature and people have to choose between the available options and improve their lifestyle by less watching television and more time with friends and family for a better life. Finally, the negative impacts of television are too dire to ignore.
One of the most conspicuous trends in
today
's world is
television
.
Some
people
believe that
television
is stopping
people
from socializing with fellow
neighbours
.
On the other hand
, others argue that
television
can connect
people
with the virtual world through interactive programs. As such, there are both merits and demerits for this trend. In my view, I
strongly
agree
that watching
television
is killing our leisure time and it leads to laziness.

Firstly
, watching
television
can
cut
ourselves from the rest of the world.
Many
people
are watching
television
programs and becoming
fat
by avoiding daily exercise routine.
However
,
teenagers
are
affected
by this activity and parents
are worried
about their declining social
skills
.
For instance
, a recent survey reported that most high school students' are no longer interested in playing outdoor games in the evening and wish to
watch
television
all day. Needless to say, watching
television
can affect our lifestyle and communication
skills
.

Secondly
, a possible solution for this trend is to allocate time for every aspect of life and try to socialize with
neighbours
.
Moreover
, over watching
television
can lead to poor eye vision and most
people
are suffering from poor vision.
For example
, researchers suggested that kids are having poor vision
because
of
television
watching.
Hence
,
people
should reassess their daily routine and try to socialize with
neighbours
to enhance their communication
skills
.

In conclusion
,
change
is the essence of nature and
people
have to
choose between the available options and
improve
their lifestyle by less watching
television
and more time with friends and family for a better life.
Finally
, the
negative
impacts of
television
are too dire to
ignore
.
8.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Television dominates the free-time of too many people. It can make people lazy and prevent them from socializing with others. v. 13

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
274 words
8.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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