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Talk about a time when you saved money for a special occasion. Please say- What was it for? - How did it feel? - Did you tell anyone about it? v.1

Talk about a time when you saved money for a special occasion. Please say- What was it for? - How did it feel? - Did you tell anyone about it? v. 1
In today's world, online networking sites have become popular amongst all age groups. Some may argue that the negative impact of social networking sites such as Facebook outweigh the positives, however, others may differ from this opinion. In my perspective, networking sites have a huge negative impact on both individual and society. This essay gingerly delineates both the viewpoints in the following paragraphs. Networking sites like Facebook make people lazy. Moreover, a person's status is defined by the number of friends he/she has online. Because of which, online friends are given more importance compared to real ones. People seek for validation online, which has also lead to an increase in peer pressure and the need to look and act perfect. To substantiate my point further, a research shows that forty percent of teenagers feel the pressure to look good on social media; it has found that they compare their real life with the short moments posted online, which leads to depression and dissatisfaction amongst them. Furthermore, online platforms are not full proof and they could prove to be a good way to hack and cyber-bully people. This could also lead to panic and depression. However, some argue that social media has made life easier. It helps people all around the world to connect. Networking sites have made it possible for people to connect with old school friends. Moreover, parents could also use it to keep track of what is happening in their Childrens' lives. It could also end up motivating people. To exemplify my point, following a person who has a healthy lifestyle on social media could also motivate one to do the same. In a nutshell, the negative impact of social media is far more than the positives. I would say that social sites could be used productively if one restricts its usage and prevents it from impacting one's mental and emotional well-being.
In
today
's world,
online
networking
sites
have become popular amongst all age groups.
Some
may
argue
that the
negative
impact of
social
networking
sites
such as Facebook outweigh the positives,
however
, others may differ from this opinion. In my perspective, networking
sites
have a huge
negative
impact on both individual and society. This essay
gingerly
delineates both the viewpoints in the following paragraphs.

Networking
sites
like Facebook
make
people
lazy.
Moreover
, a person's status
is defined
by the number of friends he/she has
online
.
Because
of which,
online
friends are
given
more importance compared to real ones.
People
seek for validation
online
, which has
also
lead
to an increase in peer pressure and the need to look and act perfect. To substantiate my point
further
,
a research
shows
that forty percent of
teenagers
feel the pressure to look
good
on
social
media
; it has found that they compare their real life with the short moments posted
online
, which leads to depression and dissatisfaction amongst them.
Furthermore
,
online
platforms are not full
proof and
they could prove to be a
good
way to hack and cyber-bully
people
. This could
also
lead to panic and depression.

However
,
some
argue that
social
media
has made life easier. It
helps
people
all around the world to connect. Networking
sites
have made it possible for
people
to connect with
old
school friends.
Moreover
, parents could
also
use
it to
keep
track
of what is happening in their
Childrens
'
lives
. It could
also
end
up motivating
people
. To exemplify my point, following a person who has a healthy lifestyle on
social
media
could
also
motivate one to do the same.

In a nutshell, the
negative
impact of
social
media
is far more than the positives. I would say that
social
sites
could be
used
productively
if one restricts its usage and
prevents
it from impacting one's mental and emotional well-being.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Talk about a time when you saved money for a special occasion. Please say- What was it for? - How did it feel? - Did you tell anyone about it? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
314 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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