Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Describe an advertisement that you saw or heard recently. Please say - What is the name of the advertisement? - Explain what it is about. - Why did you remember this advertisement? v.1

Describe an advertisement that you saw or heard recently. Please say - What is the name of the advertisement? - Explain what it is about. - Why did you remember this advertisement? v. 1
Newspapers should not publish any news that is related to the personal life of any politician. I completely agree with this school of thought because it hampers their privacy, and work and private lives have no relevance to each other, so only the necessary information should be made public. Firstly, every person, be it a politician, deals with one or the other personal issue in life. However, if this issue is made public through any medium, it seriously affects their self-pride, and which is ethically a wrong thing to happen with anyone. For example, recently a well-known Indian politician, Mr. Kailash Vijayvwargiya, filed a complaint against media for leaking his personal life information in the newspapers and T. V, which had affected his social-life drastically. Moreover, as the professional and personal life of a politician is different, newspapers should focus on publishing only that news which is important for the public to know. That is to say that people are concerned about their country’s welfare and therefore newspapers should print information that can show them if the concerned politician is working for them or not, instead of letting them know about the politician’s private-affairs. For instance, in the 2019 election, The Times of India printed that as Mr. Amit Shah, the Home-Minister of India, is not well, he will not be able to attend his daughter’s marriage. This news was redundant as it was not relevant to the elections, nor did it show any connection to the work that Mr. Amit Shah did for the nation. In conclusion, newspapers should stop printing irrelevant news about private lives of politicians as it is ethically wrong to publicly leak personal information of anyone, and a politician’s work for the nation and their personal life has no connection, therefore, it is unnecessary to publish about their private lives.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Newspapers
should not publish any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
that
is related
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
personal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
of any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
politician
. I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this school of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it hampers their privacy, and work and private
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
have no relevance to each other,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
the necessary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
should
be made
public.

Firstly
, every person, be it a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
politician
, deals with one or the other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
personal
issue in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
However
, if this issue
is made
public through any medium, it
seriously
affects their self-pride, and which is
ethically
a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
thing to happen
The verb 'happen' usually requires the preposition "to".
with
anyone.
For example
, recently a well-known Indian
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
politician
, Mr.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Kailash
Possible spelling mistake found.
Vijayvwargiya
, filed a complaint against media for leaking his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
personal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspapers
and T. V, which had
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
his social-life
drastically
.

Moreover
, as the professional and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
personal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
politician
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspapers
should focus on publishing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
which is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for the public to know.
That is
to say that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are concerned
about their country’s welfare and
therefore
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspapers
should print
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
that can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
them if the concerned
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
politician
is working for them or not,
instead
of letting them know about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
politician’s
private-affairs.
For instance
, in the 2019 election, The Times of India printed that as Mr. Amit Shah, the Home-Minister of India, is not well, he will not be able to attend his daughter’s marriage. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
was redundant as it was not relevant to the elections, nor did it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
any connection to the work that Mr. Amit Shah did for the nation.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspapers
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
printing irrelevant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
about private
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
politicians
as it is
ethically
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
to
publicly
leak
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
personal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
of anyone, and a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
politician’s
work for the nation and their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
personal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
has no connection,
therefore
, it is unnecessary to publish about their private
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
The man who does not know other languages, unless he is a man of genius, necessarily has deficiencies in his ideas.
Victor Hugo

IELTS essay Describe an advertisement that you saw or heard recently. Please say - What is the name of the advertisement? - Explain what it is about. - Why did you remember this advertisement? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
305 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts